Festive music played from the television, a cheerful song rearranged to celebrate the new year.
An Zhi had tuned into this channel ahead of time.
“Can I go too?”
An Zhi asked after a long silence.
“Those people just left… It is the New Year’s Day holiday, so they won’t come back.”
‘If Su Xixia is going to help me pay this sum, An Zhi has a right to be involved. I’ve already decided not to be mean to her anymore.’
“Fine. If things don’t look right, run immediately, okay?”
“Mmm. I’ll… find a way to call the police.”
She nodded, no longer fiddling with my phone as she stared intently at the television screen.
The song ended, and the host’s voice rang out, announcing the next group dance performance.
There were about five minutes left until the countdown.
This next act was likely the grand finale of the night.
The music began, and a program introduction appeared in the bottom left corner of the screen.
The name at the very top of the performer list caught my eye: “Xu Shijie.”
The curtains slowly parted, and the spotlight focused on the dancer in the center of the stage.
She wore a snow-white tutu, its frame nearly parallel to the floor, making her look like a white swan floating on the surface of the water.
As the music swelled, she rose.
Her hands, like wings, brushed against the water-colored floor, stirring up a shimmering light.
I was instantly captivated by her posture.
Her delicate form, nimble steps, and expressive face perfectly interpreted the meaning of purity.
This was a top-tier performance that even An Zhi couldn’t replicate…
No matter how many times I saw it, I was always struck with wonder.
This dancer was An Zhi’s mother, Xu Shijie.
Even as she grew older, she was no less impressive than she had been at her peak.
Neither An Zhi nor I said a word until the performance ended and numbers began to flash on the screen.
“Three! Two! One! Happy New Year — !!”
Only then did we realize that the new year had arrived.
“An Zhi, happy New Year!”
I kissed An Zhi’s forehead.
“Mmm, happy New Year, Mingshan.”
She left a kiss on my cheek as well, though her smile held a hint of regret.
This was the first time we had spent the New Year’s countdown together in person.
In the past, we had only congratulated each other online.
This was the first time we could snuggle together.
Despite such a rare and precious moment, we both felt a bit at a loss.
“That dance was beautiful,” I said.
“Yeah, Mother is incredible…”
“You can definitely dance that well too. Having watched you for so long, I can feel it.”
“I want to dance even better… but I won’t copy Mother. I’ll be better than her…”
There was a trace of defiance in her tone.
I drew some encouragement from her words and sat up slightly, pulling An Zhi closer by her shoulder.
I could feel the soft texture of her skin beneath my fingertips.
“Then keep working hard. I want to see that day come.”
“Mmm…”
An Zhi tilted her head against my chest.
“I’ll work hard.”
I knew that no matter how much she pleaded with her mother now, the woman wouldn’t even spare me a single glance.
Otherwise, An Zhi wouldn’t have broken ties with her family just to stay in the country before.
I lightly stroked her skin, trying to commit the sensation to memory.
‘Su Xixia, if you’ve gone through all this trouble because you genuinely want to help me, I’m afraid I’m going to have to disappoint you.’
I couldn’t use that money.
I shouldn’t.
As the countdown show neared its end, the soft singing on the TV lulled me toward sleep.
Today had been exhausting.
I hoped those thugs wouldn’t come looking for us again tomorrow —
Before falling into a dream, I offered a silent prayer.
***
“Woo-hoo! Thanks to you guys, I finally got to drive. Convincing my sister wasn’t easy! Last time I snuck the car out in the middle of the night to pick you up, she almost slaughtered me when I got back!”
Inside the black sedan filled with the scent of leather, Xiao Ji tapped the steering wheel excitedly.
This morning, after I told An Zhi we needed to go to the old apartment, Xiao Ji managed to get the car keys from his sister and drove us out.
I was grateful for Xiao Ji.
Having him around made things feel much safer.
However…
“Thanks. This mess that woman caused shouldn’t have involved you.”
“It’s fine, it’s fine. I just love ‘driving,’ you know. I finally get to experience it again.”
An Zhi, sitting in the back seat with me, gave me a curious look.
“‘Driving’?”
Dammit, don’t corrupt my An Zhi!
“This car isn’t even yours. Your dad gave the keys to your sister to keep precisely because he doesn’t want you touching it.”
I immediately steered the conversation back to the vehicle itself.
“It’s only a matter of time! My mom and sister can’t drive, and my dad has his own work car. Who else is he going to give this to? Pulling up to a bar in this BMW… now that’s having status!”
Why was he bringing up bars again…?
“I think… Yinyin wouldn’t like you like this,” An Zhi said, stating what we both already knew.
“Uh, An Zhi… this is just between us. If you don’t say anything…”
“No, I won’t help you. A bar… is a place where people mess around…”
An Zhi’s cheeks flushed slightly.
“Just ignore him, he’s always like that,” I comforted her.
“Anyway, he’s still single.”
“Ugh!”
Xiao Ji slumped in the driver’s seat, even slowing the car down significantly.
I had discussed these issues with Xiao Ji countless times, but that wasn’t the focus today.
The bustling city scenery flashed by, eventually turning into the empty factories of the suburban industrial zone.
He dropped An Zhi and me off in front of the old apartment building and waved as he rolled down his window.
“I’m off to have some fun then! Take your time. Call me when you’re ready to leave!”
“Alright! Go on.”
I watched as his car drove away.
Who opens a bar this early in the morning?
Besides, the direction he was heading was clearly toward the northeast — where the Manzou Bookstore was located.
Senior Sister Xu went there often…
Was something developing between him and Xu Yinyin?
“Does he… go to bars often?”
An Zhi asked. “Yinyin hates that.”
“I don’t think we need to worry about their business. Let’s go.”
I took An Zhi’s small hand in mine.
“Mmm? Okay… let’s not talk about him then.”
Facing the familiar, dilapidated apartment building, our pace instinctively slowed.
Arriving at the door, I saw that the upper wooden plank of the shoe rack had been smashed in two.
No shoes were visible inside.
I pulled back the wood and felt relieved to see that An Zhi’s dance shoes were still in the drawer.
“Ah, they’re still here… the first pair of shoes you gave me.”
She happily picked up one of the dust-covered dance shoes.
I walked forward a few steps and saw that the window pane near the balcony had been shattered.
The wooden frame supporting the glass was dented inward.
If the frame hadn’t held, someone could have climbed straight in…
That was close.
“Let’s go inside.”
I sighed.
“There’s no one here.”
“Did Su Xixia… really move out? I’ll feel guilty if she got hurt because of my situation. This looks so scary. A girl living alone must have been terrified.”
An Zhi bit her lower lip as she noticed the window.
She had no intention of blaming Su Xixia and was instead worried about her.
This angelic capacity for forgiveness was something I admired.
Even though I also sympathized with Su Xixia, imagining what she must have felt while alone as the windows and shoe rack were being smashed…
It made me shiver.
‘I’ll be more patient with her once I find her.’
“Su Xixia!”
I pushed open the door and saw that the room was so empty it looked like an unfinished shell.
The desk, the wardrobe — every place that could be opened was open and empty.
Only a rusted bed frame remained; the bedding and everything else were gone.
A terrifying thought surfaced in my mind.
‘Su Xixia… she wasn’t kidnapped by the Wings Star World, was she? And somehow she earned that 500,000 Compensation?’
No, if that were the case, she wouldn’t be able to transfer the money out.
If she really got 500,000, why did she transfer an extra 8,000 yuan?
That extra money was clearly what I had sent her before.
She must have transferred the entire balance of her card.
Technically, 500,000 would have been enough.
Why send it all to me?
I shook my head, searching every hidden corner while I thought.
An Zhi crouched on the floor, looking around as if she didn’t care about the dirt.
“An Zhi, those clothes don’t fit well. Be careful,” I reminded her.
“No, I want to help you. I want to find her and ask… about her feelings for you. Then, I’ll convince you to give the money back.”
“You’re telling me your whole plan already… haha.”
I gave a bitter laugh.
After finishing with the wardrobe, I turned to the stove and cabinets.
Then, in the gap between the stove and the counter, I saw a strap sticking out.
“Is this… the bag she patched for me?”
I muttered as I pulled the strap, dragging out the heavily mended bag.
“Did she leave it on purpose?”
An Zhi leaned in.
Inside were the scarf and clothes she had given me.
Taking them out made me feel a surge of guilt.
Then, in the innermost compartment of the bag, I felt a crumpled piece of paper.
On it, written in hideous handwriting, was: “I’m helping you one more time! Since you want to be with her so badly, then be together!”
It was definitely her handwriting.
It looked exactly like it did back in school — truly ugly…
She wrote this as if she were angry, but reading it felt like she truly wanted to help.
‘That woman is so hard to understand! Where is she hiding!?’
I had to find her and get an explanation!
How could she just leave An Zhi and me together like this?
Did she think this would atone for everything?
“The back… there’s more writing on the back.”
An Zhi tilted her head and pointed to the other side of the paper.
I flipped it over.
Written in large letters that seemed to take up the entire page was: “You’ll definitely come looking for me! Let me tell you, you won’t find me!”
‘Is this woman trying to piss me off on purpose!?’
I clutched the paper, my brow furrowing as I realized something was wrong.
If she transferred all her money to me, how was she surviving in the city?
And if she chose to go home…
She would have to get married!?
She had mentioned this to me before…
If she went back, her family would force her to marry that wealthy…
Uncle Zhao from the village entrance?
Right, I remembered now!
She had told me.
Did her money come from Uncle Zhao?
Was it basically a bride price…?
No, she had said something even more important…
“My body is only for you to touch…”
“If I’m caught and taken back, I’ll find a way to kill myself…”
The scene from that night flashed in my mind.
Her voice when she broke down seemed to ring in my ears.
Right, back then, I had made a deal with her out of pity…
And then she betrayed that deal.
I had originally thought she was just saying those things to gain sympathy…
But now, I had to doubt my previous judgment.
She had transferred her entire balance to me and taken all her belongings, as if trying to completely erase any trace of her existence.
Combined with her abnormal behavior of not answering her phone…
Could it be…
No, it’s almost certain! Suicide…
Is she still alive?
“An… An Zhi… An Zhi!”
The bag slipped from my hands.
I couldn’t stop my legs from trembling, and I sank to my knees on the floor.
“Mingshan! What’s wrong? Mingshan?”
An Zhi leaned down to support me, her eyes wide with worry.
Dead?
No…
She wouldn’t…
How could a person like her die?
She wasn’t the type of person to sacrifice everything for someone else!
Would she really take a bride price and then kill herself for me?
Impossible…
It’s impossible!!
No, wait — think carefully.
When we first started talking, she insisted on standing in front of me even though she knew the boys who bullied me in elementary school were nearby.
When I was chased and hid by the river, she declared in front of the teachers and students that “only she could bully me.”
When I was homeless and couldn’t pay rent, she took the only thing she had left — a stolen family heirloom — to help pay the debt, cutting off her only retreat.
‘Did I misjudge her? Because I categorized her and the other students as “idiots” from the start, I assumed everything she did was just to hurt me…’
In reality, she had protected me many times.
Just as she had said.
And I had never taken it seriously.
Come to think of it, the “revenge” I carried out after high school graduation…
Was it perhaps an outlet for the confusion of my own budding feelings?
My head throbbed with a spliting pain.
The *buzzing* in my ears grew louder and louder, gradually drowning out An Zhi’s worried cries.