Ryan was incredibly shy as a kid, barely able to speak in front of others.
Despite his massive size, he’d shrink when people criticized him, unable to say a word.
That made him an easy target for other kids’ pranks.
I never knew how cruel it was to name him after a lion, expecting him to be brave.
In the end, to protect himself, he got tattoos, locking himself in a self-imposed cage.
“You know what my old habit was?”
What?
“Sighing.”
He had so many stressful days back then that he started sighing without realizing it.
And since Yongsu Kwon was the same, Ryan could tell.
“These kids aren’t even that close to you yet, idiot. How do you think they’d feel if you sigh in front of them?”
…Oh.
“You’re a writer, and you don’t understand people’s feelings?”
The kids were probably scared.
A sigh is a mix of frustration and irritation, after all.
Hearing it out of nowhere, they might think they caused it.
What does being a writer have to do with it? I can miss things too.
“Anyway, be careful around them. Once you’re close, it’s fine, but until then, make an effort so they feel comfortable approaching you. Got it, idiot?”
Shut up, jerk.
“This guy wants to die…”
Pfft.
Ryan let out a chuckle and stood up.
“Hurry up and finish organizing. My wife’s coming soon.”
…Alright.
Sighing, huh…
I need to be more careful than I thought.
I trudged to the fridge to prepare dinner.
***
When Yongsu went to study abroad, he wasn’t alone.
It was a government program, so students from various schools went to Canada together.
Among them was a high school girl named Mijeong Shin.
Yongsu raising kids…
Since all the students attended the same school, the Korean students naturally grew close.
Among them, Yongsu stood out the most.
I never thought he’d choose to raise kids…
Yongsu was different.
He didn’t care about making friends but studied hard.
No, it wasn’t just studying—he felt different, like his goals weren’t the same as the other students’.
We got close somehow… but honestly, I found it hard to approach him.
Mijeong, with her great social skills, got along with many students.
She talked to Yongsu a few times, but back then, he seemed detached, like he was obsessed with something.
Even Mijeong found it hard to get close to him.
I never imagined we’d stay connected like this.
Some students returned to Korea after the program, but others, like Mijeong, wanted to stay in Canada.
She wanted to learn more about the country, went to university there, and eventually considered immigrating.
Ironically, Mijeong reconnected with Yongsu at the publishing company where she worked.
It was funny enough that he became a writer…
Mijeong, who loved literature, majored in Korean literature and got a job at Bear Books.
During her internship, she met Yongsu again, but he was gloomier and darker than before.
Back then, Yongsu was a rising star, a bestselling rookie author and a key figure at Bear Books.
Mijeong, being from the same hometown, worked with Rooney to support him.
I quit after that…
After meeting Ryan and deciding to move to the countryside, she left the company.
She heard about Yongsu’s slump and suggested he move next door.
After hesitating for a while, Yongsu built the house he wanted next to hers, becoming neighbors.
So much has happened…
Mijeong gave a small smile, thinking of the scattered memories of the past.
She headed to Yongsu’s house, carrying bags of food in both hands.
Ding-dong!
When she arrived, she rang the doorbell.
After a moment, a voice came through the intercom.
“Who is it?”
It’s me.
“Oh, Mijeong? Hang on. Ryan! Your wife’s here!”
“Yo!”
Ryan’s voice came through.
When she first met him, he was like a wounded bear, afraid of people, but now his voice was livelier and braver than anyone’s.
They both still seem so young…
It was hard to believe the two men she met in her youth had grown into such adults.
Time felt cruel in moments like this.
Whoosh!
“You’re here? Heavy? Give it to me.”
“Here.”
Mijeong handed the bags to Ryan.
Then, she tilted her head.
“…Why’s it so heavy?”
What do you mean? It’s heavy because it’s for eight people.
“Eight people…?”
Food, what else?
“No way…”
Mijeong smiled proudly at Ryan’s words.
I brought food. Let’s eat.
Ryan’s face twisted at her words.
Picky eater.
To Mijeong, he still seemed like a kid.
***
At the company, after everyone else had left, Rooney, an employee at Bear Books, sat at his desk with a sour expression, spinning a pen while staring at the computer.
“Slumps really aren’t easy, huh…”
As an editor, he’d managed countless authors.
Even now, he was handling Yongsu and others.
But a persistent problem always followed.
Slumps.
An inevitable fate for artists.
“Well… Adele Louis was bound to hit a slump eventually.”
Purpose and dreams are different.
A purpose has an end, but a dream can only blossom with purpose as its foundation.
Those who think their purpose is their dream… they’ll eventually stop.
Those who don’t understand the essence of purpose and dreams will face a slump.
Yongsu was no different.
His purpose was success as a writer, but not knowing a greater dream led to his slump.
Or maybe he forgot…
He burned his life with passion but forgot his dream in the process.
Forgetting his original intent led to his slump.
“Will he write again…?”
The bigger the purpose, the harsher reality becomes.
A slump, once it hits, might never lift.
Many authors quit because of it.
He’s got so many projects, it’s a shame…
Adele Louis’s most popular series, The Seven Suns, hadn’t reached its conclusion.
The final book, The Gravedigger, was a massive hit, so as Yongsu’s editor, Rooney hoped he’d come back to life as a writer.
“I’ll have to trust Mijeong…”
Mijeong, once his subordinate and Yongsu’s assistant, had moved to the countryside at his invitation.
But the countryside was more dangerous than the city, so Rooney couldn’t help but worry.
Still, he had to believe she’d help Yongsu overcome his slump.
But three years had passed.
“To break a slump… what does it take?”
Some need love, others a new environment, or a job.
Just as people are diverse, so are the ways to overcome a slump.
That’s why it’s so hard to break, requiring you to try all sorts of things.
Raising kids… will that help or hurt?
Rooney shook his head, brushing off his thoughts.
He’d been too caught up in worry.
Having worked with Yongsu since his rookie days, he couldn’t help but care.
“Time to go home.”
Rooney shook off his thoughts and stood up.
***
Mijeong began setting out the food she brought on the dining table.
Thankfully, most of it was just reheated frozen food, not something she made from scratch.
There was no way she could’ve cooked in such a short time.
“Phew…”
“Hoo…”
These weren’t sighs of frustration but relief.
Even Ryan, who’d scolded me about sighing, let out a sigh beside me.
That was close.
I’d flinched when she said she brought food.
Canadian frozen food is tasty, so it was trustworthy.
“What’re you doing? Eat already.”
Come on, kids, let’s eat.
I sliced the rolled porchetta and put it on the kids’ plates first.
Hye-yeon tilted her head at the unfamiliar food.
“What’s this…?”
Porchetta, an Italian pork belly dish. Eat it with the spicy sauce on the side.
“Pork belly?”
The kids cautiously picked up their forks and knives to cut the porchetta.
Marcello had given us some sauce, but the kids were more used to spicy flavors.
“Cut some for Jiyu too!”
Hold on.
For Jiyu, Bessie, and Roy, I cut the porchetta into bite-sized pieces.
Their mouths were so small, it took a while to cut it down.
Here, open wide.
“Ahh~”
I put a piece of porchetta in Jiyu’s mouth.
As it slid into her small mouth, she started chewing.
“Mmm! Yummy! More!”
Alright, alright.
“Ahh~!”
Like a baby bird being fed, Jiyu kept eating the porchetta.
Ryan and Mijeong, who were tending to Bessie and Roy, looked at me.
What? Why?
“No, just… nothing.”
Lame.
I kept feeding Jiyu.
As I did, Mijeong said with a hint of wonder,
“It’s… surprising. I never thought you’d raise kids.”
“ ”
I don’t like taking responsibility for things.
Loving something felt strangely foreign to me.
I could’ve gotten a pet to ease loneliness, but I didn’t want the responsibility, so I relied on alcohol instead.
“Now that you have kids, shouldn’t you start dating too?”
No talking like that in front of the kids. Shut up and eat.
Mijeong’s eyes changed at my words.
“You… no way?”
“ ”
I’d once laughed at the saying that a woman’s intuition can sense a cheating boyfriend from a thousand miles away.
…That’s scary.
A woman’s intuition is terrifying.