Chapter 37: Bai Ya Has a Reason Not to Die

“Although I don’t know who you are, nor your name, I hope you can save me.”

Bai Ya’s clear voice sounded again at this moment, calm to the point where one couldn’t feel any urgency in her plea for help.

Putting aside the fact that Bai Ya’s condition was beyond saving, the girl never intended to save her from the start. Now, hearing those words, irritation surged within her.

“I refuse.” The girl said firmly and resolutely, hoping that this rejection would make Bai Ya give up and die.

Suddenly, she furrowed her brow, sensing something was off but unable to pinpoint what. This vague feeling was maddening.

Her displeasure all stemmed from Bai Ya. A slave girl shouldn’t have her own will; the purpose of her existence was to devote everything to her master. Without those restrictions, she would have killed Bai Ya right then.

Bai Ya Ifiel Clorom, just die quickly. The girl could only tilt her head and pray silently.

She was disappointed once more.

“I hope you can save me. I want to live. I should live. I can’t die yet.”

Bai Ya’s third sentence remained as calm as before. Such an emotionless plea sounded like she was a bystander coldly watching everything unfold. No one could understand how she managed to maintain such a state.

That near-death tranquility was not something an ordinary person could have. The girl felt like she was about to forget that Bai Ya was on the brink of death.

Bai Ya still seemed able to communicate normally. Although the girl had no idea how, this was not how someone about to die should look!

“How many times do I have to remind you!” The girl unintentionally raised her voice, her cheeks flushing with excitement. “You’re beyond saving! You’re the runaway slave Bai Ya Ifiel Clorom. Since you’re a slave, you should know death is the best outcome! Why do you still live and suffer?”

“As long as you die, you’ll be freed from suffering. For you, and for all slaves, death is the best ending. It’s better to just die.”

Sighing, the girl glanced at Bai Ya. Her only remaining right pupil had no light, as black and deep as a swamp under the night sky, lifeless and dragging one into despair.

Bai Ya Ifiel Clorom looked strange. The girl doubted if this was the look of someone truly conscious.

But Bai Ya’s earlier words couldn’t have come without consciousness. Was Bai Ya still maintaining awareness now, or had she lost it?

“It’s not because I have someone important to protect that I have a reason not to die…” Bai Ya coughed violently several times, spitting out blood as her voice began to hoarsen.

Blood continuously overflowed from the corner of her mouth. Her faint life force flickered like a candle in a storm, ready to be extinguished at any moment.

The girl suddenly had an illusion: as soon as Bai Ya finished speaking, she would completely die.

Then she might as well be a silent listener. After all, what she was meant to do was wait for Bai Ya’s death.

“I want to live… Finding a reason to die is easy, but finding a reason to live is incredibly difficult. I found it, I found a reason to live…”

“Because it’s my responsibility. Responsibility is such a troublesome thing. It’s because of it that I have to live.”

“What are you talking about?” The girl frowned, unable to comprehend Bai Ya’s words.

“Responsibility—once you take it on, you can never drop it. Whether you like it or not, only by doing so can you become a man who stands tall and proud. That’s the kind of existence I long for the most…”

The girl gave up thinking further. A girl longing to become a man who stands tall and proud? Bai Ya, this slave, must have lost her mind…

The following words were probably nonsense.

“After ending up like this, I kept wondering why I had to suffer like this…”

Thinking carefully, the girl was very curious about why Bai Ya had escaped. Every slave on the transport ship knew that escaping led only to death. The ship was about to dock at Amidal, where nobles were planning one last wild party. Escaping at this time was the most foolish thing to do. Yet Bai Ya did it—and not only that, she indirectly caused the deaths of dozens of nobles.

The girl had taken Bai Ya’s profile along with the wanted poster. According to it, Bai Ya Ifiel Clorom was a former imperial princess, a flower in a greenhouse, born to live a pampered life. For a girl like her to do something so bold after becoming a slave was truly unexpected.

Having endured imprisonment and training on the transport ship, this slave had not lost her will to resist. What was the reason that kept her going until now? The girl grew more curious the more she thought about it.

“…Because it’s a responsibility, I have no choice. Because it’s a responsibility, no one can blame me. Because it’s my responsibility…”

She kept talking about responsibility, responsibility. What exactly was this so-called responsibility?

“What? What responsibility?” The girl frowned and asked.

“When I felt like I was about to die, I kept thinking there must be someone smarter and more capable who could save those people. Actually, I only cared about one little girl. I made a big promise to that little girl, whose name I don’t even know—to definitely save her. Someone else would make that promise come true, right? That’s what I thought…”

Bai Ya’s voice grew weaker and weaker, but even so, every syllable from her throat was forced out clearly.

“I can’t do it. Even if I think this way, even if I wish this way, no matter how I comfort or deceive myself, my heart’s voice repeats over and over.”

The girl didn’t realize she had clenched the wanted poster tightly, her knuckles white with tension.

“There must be someone smarter and more capable,” she thought, “someone to hope for. But the truth is, the only person she can rely on now is me. This fact—I can’t lie to myself about it.”