Chapter 96: Noise Canceling

<Suction!>

It kept using suction, so I cracked open the trash can lid to give it something to inhale—and it sucked everything up nicely.

It even pulled in plastic snack wrappers, so I basically recruited the ocean’s top vacuum cleaner.

[Where are you bastards? Come out, dungeon giant!]

“Fish is fish…”

Doesn’t it know this is a world of giants?

The anglerfish nicknamed Terror Jaws has a high level and an especially big head and mouth, making it look like a giant tadpole.

Contrary to its bold telepathy, its stamina keeps dropping.

<Gill Breathing LV25>

Performs at peak condition in water.

The higher the level, the better the condition.

Out of water, it evaporates by the second or minute proportional to current health. Requires quick combat.

“The maritime clan is pitiful.”

Thinking about it, I get why they’re the weakest clan.

They’re small to begin with, and completely useless out of water.

“As you saw, they’re mostly made of ingredients that haven’t even awakened. That penalty gave humans a chance to counterattack in wars—though humans never seized it.”

According to the Nightmare Queen, awakened individuals like this Terror Jaws are rare.

They bluff in combat, but without water, it’s impossible.

Right now, it’s just… a fish fry.

The rule is to release fry, but no reason to do that here.

I was about to flick it like a forehead bullet when it sucked again.

“Whoa!”

Startled, but it inhaled the dirt under my nails.

Not enough to rip them off.

“Good show.”

Then I flicked it; it flew from the gate floor, hit the window frame, and rolled down.

It turned even more limp than just tossing an anglerfish.

No reason to keep it alive, and its level is too high to raise.

Suction was pretty impressive, though.

The little guy even sucked up hair near the bathroom foot mat.

If it were cat-sized, it might’ve inhaled shoes by the entrance.

<Suction LV3>

Can digest anything.

All sorts of random skills keep popping up.

My level jumps straight into the 2400s.

Breaking the 2000s triggers a bunch of miscellaneous skill level-ups.

With over 250 slots, counting them is annoying.

But the level-up thrill remains; I look at the dragon bone fishing rod again.

“Does this work on fish that aren’t invading?”

[Try it! My level rose a lot too!]

Sorry for fishing non-invaders…

No way.

It’s fish.

Too small for sashimi anyway, and CatMan says he’s too refined to play with prey.

Since fishing led to a level-up precedent, I excitedly cast the line into the gate again.

“Got a bite?”

<Bent Back LV210>

This looks like a black tiger shrimp?

I thought it’d be expensive, but not really.

Destined for shrimp paste.

<Bad Temper LV899>

Just a corpse.

“…This one came dead?”

I tossed the descaled silver pomfret.

Name starts with “bad temper,” huh.

<Pee Stream LV150>

“Pee?”

Why the name for a sea squirt?

Does it even have a mouth for the hook?

[Hmm, decent feed, but didn’t expect them to bite so well.]

I’d stationed CatMan to guard the tank in the management office, but called him back.

He’s sticking right by my side.

Like how dock fishermen attract stray cats hoping for fish scraps.

“Stuff like taurine is in them; these are what they eat in the sea, so tasty, right?”

[Seems so?]

CatMan raises a front paw; his legs—supposed to be agile for speed—are pretty muscled.

“You work out?”

[Just got a lot stronger. Well, don’t we always walk in push-up position?]

True.

I just flung the anglerfish earlier, hitting level 2333.

Pet and spirit levels rise proportionally.

<CatMan LV1167 Pet, Thief, Strongest Feline Man>

New title?

Aigoo, strongest man among cats?

He’d dominate cat UFC, but if that existed, organizers and animal rights folks would go ballistic—pointless fantasy.

While fishing, the Nightmare Queen doesn’t look happy.

She’s sighing, holding her beloved smartphone without touching it.

Like a wife sighing when her husband goes fishing.

“What’s wrong? Annoyed CatMan’s having fun?”

“No, not that.”

Only I’m annoyed?

“Then what?”

“The gate was near my palace. These things keep coming out means my palace sank, right?”

Of…

Her home sank, so yeah, that face makes sense.

“Isn’t this your palace now?”

“Of course it’s luxurious, and the furniture suits me perfectly… but it’s cramped.”

The princess house is tiny.

No matter how nice, it can’t compare to a palace.

“So the area near the gate was originally land?”

“Yes. Now flooded, so these guys come out? Maritime clan needs water to operate.”

Makes sense.

Another bite in the meantime.

“Whoops.”

Good hand feel?

<Sundae Gift LV221>

Sea cucumber responds to otherworld extreme stress by immediately ejecting its guts.

Then slumps, unable to regenerate them.

Names are translated for me, right? Not original?

Where’s “sundae” from there?

Among the hooked maritime monsters, one oddball clung to the dragon bone hook with one arm…

Upper body human female with fin ears, lower fish—like a mermaid, but the label said otherwise.

<Siren LV2750>

Emerging from the gate, its arms turn into subtle flying fish-like wings, hovering.

“Wow, an actual mermaid.”

“Dangerous!”

Whack!

The Nightmare Queen’s earnest kick grazes past me, hitting the siren.

“Kyeeeeeeeek!”

The siren, struck by her kick, lets out an ear-splitting screech just hearing it hurts.

“Ugh!?”

“Kyaoong?!”

“Huh?”

Loud enough to wake the Fairy Princess from her all-day nap.

Its name might be something like Kkukkgakka.

“Got it?”

“Well, my kicks are pretty strong. Ah, should’ve let you have the level.”

“No, it’s fine—urgent, just take it.”

You can charm more later.

The siren, kicked by the Nightmare Queen, flies, hits the window frame, wings turn back to arms, lands on the floor.

Not dead yet; places hand on chest again.

“Ah… Kyeeek.”

Posing, then kicked once more by the queen.

Flies into the air, bounces off ceiling, then window frame—three-cushion shot; something small drops.

Tiny monster half the queen’s size, no kid-sized clam bra to cover anything—where’d that come from?

Small item drops; label appears late.

Using <Focus> skill to examine: identified as a box; opens with clear sound mismatched to worn appearance.

That instant.

“Ugh?!”

“Ahhh…”

“No, stop. Ah.”

“Kyaooooong!?”

“Ang, ang?!”

Clear sound, yet sound waves pierce ears—everyone in the house covers them or can’t endure.

<Cursed Song LV40>

Without special sound defense, attack ignores defense and magic defense for full effect.

“Kyaaaaang.”

Armless Yong-gae buries head first and collapses; Fairy Princess hugging pot faints like going back to sleep.

Combat-ready me, CatMan, Nightmare Queen hold ears and endure.

Then.

Recovered siren starts singing again.

“Grrk, what is this noise?”

Orgel dropped from siren’s bosom harmonizes with her voice.

<Cursed Song LV80>

Only the deaf can block this sound.

Mermaids are beautiful when they sell their voice, huh.

Ears feel like bursting; couldn’t do anything.

“Queen, why can’t you hold out?”

“My whole body… even ears are sensitive. Ahh.”

Seducing even now?

[Buy me an iPod…]

Hint from CatMan’s groan, but the noise stiffens people beyond that.

Siren’s tone changes; Yong-gae rolls, bites ear-covered CatMan.

“Kyaooooong!”

But she bites anyway normally; like Yong-gae, Nightmare Queen covers ears, approaches me mouth open.

Bite force not strong, but her biting feels wrong?

Something makes me want to attack too.

Mouth still works, so I yelled.

“Taking the chance to pounce!?”

“Uhh… Yes.”

These monsters collab at this timing?

Grotesque sound continues; health starts dropping.

Then.

[Daring to attack the princess! Lowest scum—not even cat food, just sea anemone bait in a tank!]

RiceCookerMan flies in.

Only attacks: body slam or Mario jump; can’t leave outlet…

But power cord physically extends?

By glowing connection thread!?

<Thread of Connection protects energy within operational radius>

That bastard.

Used it to expand his range?

The ‘Dragon Spear (tentative)’ thread I threw in—he embezzled for his operational radius.

[Now!]

Anyway, during the brief music stop from RiceCookerMan’s attack.

I quickly open the charging lid and equip wireless earbuds.

Noise canceling always on.

But just on isn’t enough—play music.

For charm block, (old) New Millennium Health Gymnastics, National Health Gymnastics plays.

Schools still teach it in PE. Teachers pick between teen gymnastics, but mine stuck to the classics.

Heard it passing the gym recently; nostalgic and upbeat.

Remember kids “practicing” by smacking friends with it.

Hand blade strike lower part comes up.

Motion fits lower hand blade attack; siren’s small body makes target low.

<Noisy Screech LV40>

Siren sees my gust-mixed attack coming, starts kyaaaing.

“This is electronic industry, you bastard.”

First hand blade dodged by turning arms to flying fish wings, but it overlooked something.

‘Body twist hand blade strike’ is lower, middle, upper.

[Lid opening!]

RiceCookerMan opens his own lid, steams; wings heavy, siren drops.

Meanwhile, can’t handle force from my hand blade; gust explodes.

“Kyeeeeeee.”

Direct hit; siren crushed without trace, vanishes.

Final screech drops health too.

<Old Orgel>

Contains funeral march recorded by humans just before extinction 100 years ago.

Another weird drop.

“Phew. Everyone okay?”

[Buy me an iPod.]

“Buy me an iPod.”

Unlike CatMan, Nightmare Queen has human-like ears—would work for her.

“Yeah, got it. I’ll buy, but where to put it?”

“Can’t exactly stuff X in earholes…”

“…Where do you keep learning that?”

Good thing the kid’s asleep.