Zhi Nian… she’s been acting really strange lately.
Maybe it’s because we go to the same school now. Compared to how distant we were before—barely interacting—things have gotten much better. She’s become more… proactive.
Luckily, I don’t mind this change.
Every time I interact with her, I worry I might end up disliking her. But so far, that hasn’t happened.
Back when we were kids, I was always the one leading her.
Whatever I did, she followed.
But after we cut ties, I never had the energy to pull someone along with me again.
However…
I glanced behind me.
Around the hallway corner, a long black cat tail was lightly tapping the floor.
I think, maybe now—it’s Zhi Nian who might end up pulling me forward.
Just… in a rather unusual way.
“Zhi Nian, I see you. You don’t have to hide.”
As soon as I spoke, the tail froze mid-air.
Zhi Nian slowly poked her head out. The pair of cat ears on her head drooped timidly, like a poor kitten that had just been scolded.
So cute.
“U-uh, I wasn’t stalking you or anything.”
Her attempt at denial only made me want to laugh more.
From the moment school ended, to when I went to the basketball court, then back to the classroom for a forgotten textbook, and finally on the way to the bus stop—I could sense her presence the entire time.
Zhi Nian’s stalking skills were honestly terrible.
She kept half her body in plain view, and her distance control was so poor that I could’ve just turned around and caught her with a few quick steps.
“So, is there something you wanted to talk to me about?”
After all, we’d played together for five or six years. And Zhi Nian wears her thoughts on her face—it’s not hard to guess what she’s thinking.
I crossed my arms and smiled, waiting for her to get to the point.
“Nnnghhh…”
Her face flushed bright red.
Her soft pink lips were pressed tightly together, eyes misting over with a watery sheen. She avoided my gaze and anxiously fiddled with the hem of her school uniform.
“I-I forgot a textbook… I’m going back to the classroom.”
She said it quickly and in a low voice, then clutched her bag and bolted back toward the school.
Even though… she had just gone back to the classroom with me.
That excuse was so thin it wouldn’t hold up to the slightest bit of scrutiny. One poke, and it’d fall apart.
But I didn’t chase her.
I know that for cats—or catgirls—this kind of thing takes time.
Forcing my own pace on her might only backfire.
Speaking of which, are cats and catgirls the same species?
On my way home, I found myself thinking about that.
* * * * *
Idiot idiot idiot!
I’m such a hopeless, absolute idiot!
As I ran, I felt the wind pushing against my forehead and the front of my body. In my heart, there was this strange impulse—to throw myself into the wind and let it wrap around me completely.
I clenched my teeth so hard it felt like I might shatter them, silently cursing myself for fumbling my words like a fool.
I stalked Gu Fan all day… just to find a chance to talk to him. I spent so long preparing for it, but the moment we met, I chickened out?
Instead of going back to the classroom, I ended up in the school’s geography garden, sitting beside a globe.
With the evening slowly creeping in, I rested my elbows on my knees and propped my chin up in a daze.
It’s already been a few days since Gu Fan accepted my friend request. And today’s Friday—once today’s school day is over, I’ll lose all courage to go to his place during the weekend.
These past few days, we’ve barely spoken. We’ve barely even crossed paths.
Ironically, now that we’ve begun reconnecting, I’ve become even more hyperaware of his presence.
The moment he appears in my line of sight… I instinctively hide.
I thought using our contact info would be an easy way to start a conversation. But when I finally mustered the courage to message him, he replied so late that all the topics I’d carefully prepared had frozen into useless ice shards, dulled by time.
In the end, I didn’t even manage to send anything.
Nothing works. Nothing feels right. So I’ve ended up pushing myself to act in real life instead.
Which led to… today’s little stalking episode.
The streetlights flicked on one by one with a click, click, click.
The path beneath the campus trees was veiled in dappled shadows and carried a faint, refreshing scent of grass and leaves.
The late autumn breeze was a little chilly. I snapped out of my daze, zipped my jacket all the way up, and flipped the collar up.
I’d missed the last afternoon bus.
Now, if I wanted to catch another, I’d have to wait a long time.
If it were any other family, their parents would probably have dinner ready, waiting for their child to come home.
Maybe they’d even start getting anxious if the kid was too late.
But I don’t need to worry about any of that.
Which means… I can walk home as slowly as I like.
Hmm… I should probably grab something on the way and make that dinner.
My social boundaries are pretty much limited to the few sentences exchanged during a purchase transaction.
After watching Gu Fan today, I finally realized just how effortlessly he handles social interactions.
A real normie through and through…
As I happened to pass a deli shop, I stopped in my tracks.
Maybe I should try pushing myself a little.
If I can just keep up with Gu Fan’s pace… maybe things would feel a bit easier.
Deep breath…
And then I stepped inside.
Picked out what I wanted to eat in silence, scanned the code, paid, and left.
Didn’t even need to say a word. I’m such a hopeless, absolute idiot!
As I ran, I felt the wind pushing against my forehead and the front of my body. In my heart, there was this strange impulse—to throw myself into the wind and let it wrap around me completely.
I clenched my teeth so hard it felt like I might shatter them, silently cursing myself for fumbling my words like a fool.
Didn’t feel like much of a ‘social training’ session after all.
And even that wordless exchange with the cashier managed to leave me feeling frustrated and agitated, though not to the point of visibly losing control.
After that failure, I didn’t have much appetite for dinner.
I just forced some food down to fill my stomach, without really tasting anything.
…Is there even any point?
For someone like me who hates socializing this much—was it even necessary to try approaching Gu Fan?
Could it be… I was just being delusional?
And besides, can I even make Gu Fan happy?
He seems to be living a perfectly fine life as it is.
Whether I’m in it or not… doesn’t seem to make much difference.
Ugh… forget it. I still have a shift at the cat café tomorrow. No point thinking about this. I should just go home and get some sleep.
* * * * *
“Yo, Xiao Shen. Rough day today?”
During lunch break, after sending off the last customer, I sat down in the staff break room. That’s when the manager quietly snuck over to me and asked.
I couldn’t exactly tell her the real reason for my bad mood, so I casually brushed it off.
“Mm… It’s nothing. I’ll get over it soon.”
I don’t know whether the manager just had sharp instincts or if my gloom was showing clearly on my face.
Either way, I really didn’t want anyone to notice how I was feeling…
“Hmph…”
The manager leaned over with interest and peered at my face. I quietly turned my gaze away, avoiding eye contact.
“Let me guess—it’s something to do with love, right?”
“?!”
My eyebrows shot up in surprise, and that reaction only made the manager laugh even more smugly.
“Ha! I knew it. Girls your age usually have that kind of trouble.”
“Ah? Uh, um…”
My lips parted slightly, about to blurt out a denial.
But then I thought—maybe letting her misunderstand isn’t the worst thing.
I’m not exactly the best at reading people’s personalities, but judging from the manager’s usual behavior, if I were to deny it now, she’d just keep pressing for answers.
So, with no other option, I let the misunderstanding slide, vaguely allowing her assumption to stand.
Sorry, Gu Fan.
If this ends up offending you somehow, I promise I’ll find a way to make it up to you.
I whispered silent apologies in my heart, praying that Gu Fan—wherever he was—could forgive me.
At the same time, I swore to bury this whole incident deep. He absolutely must never find out.
“So?”
“Wanna have a little heart-to-heart with your dear manager?”
The manager twirled a strand of her long hair, the tips dyed a vivid shade of red.
“Don’t be fooled just because I’m single now. Back in my prime, I was a total love guru. People lined up just to fall for me. Lost count ages ago.”
“Ah…”
I looked up, meeting her gaze—one burning with curiosity and amusement.
I wasn’t sure if this kind of interest in romance was something that came naturally to all women…
Or if it was just her being, well, her.
But it was true—compared to me, the manager had a lot more life experience.
And with me being such a clueless, awkward newbie—not to mention only recently stepping into girlhood—
She was probably the best person I could ask for help.
First misunderstanding..
Thanks for the chapter