“Sigh, what should I do……”
Both my hands pressed on the long stone slab beneath me, a layer of fine sand covering its surface, making my palms a lot dirtier.
But right now, I couldn’t care less about whether my clothes were neat or not. Even if I got a moment to rest, the gloom in my heart remained, sticking to the sky of my mood like stubborn clouds.
I let out a sigh, patted my hands to brush off the sand, then took out a tissue from my dress pocket to wipe the sweat from my forehead and collarbone.
Though I didn’t feel like tidying up, the inner lining I wore today was light-colored and rather thin.
Now that I was sweating all over, I could feel the fabric clinging slightly to my figure, outlining my shape—a uniquely troublesome problem for girls.
If I were about to go on a date with Gu Fan, or have some intimate moment like holding hands or hugging, then I honestly wouldn’t mind at all.
I might even consider, why not use the water pipe by the roadside well to douse myself and get all soaked, just like a drenched kitten……
No, wait… wasn’t that expression originally used to describe something made into a delicious soup? Is it really appropriate to use it for a catgirl like me?
Ugh, I really regret not studying Chinese well enough before. Now, when I actually need to show some writing skill, I can’t come up with even a few useful idioms or adjectives.
Looking at it another way, making myself into a dish that’s mouthwatering and tempting sounds kind of nice too? If I can get Gu Fan to pay more attention to me, isn’t that exactly my original goal?
Hehe, just imagining Gu Fan seeing me holding a plate with a creamy cake, slowly walking toward him—his fingers twitching in anticipation, but he’s too shy to make a move and has to look away—how cute~
Just thinking of Gu Fan, my heart always floods with a sweet, honeyed feeling, nourishing all kinds of crops growing in my heart as if they’ve met the first rain of early spring, instantly sprouting strong and tall.
Even though Gu Fan isn’t by my side, but rather in that small rural village closer to Yu City, far away from me.
But I can still, through imagination, conjure up all kinds of daily life with him and deeper, dreamier fantasies, creating a warmth for myself that’s as strong as sunlight.
With this incredible warmth, I manage to burn through the thick, gloomy clouds of negativity covering my mood, letting warmth shine again on my heart, spreading to every part of my body.
“Mmm… I really miss Gu Fan……”
Murmuring quietly to myself, I crumpled up the tissues I’d used to wipe my neck and forehead.
From all the sweat, they were already soaked, like freshly opened wet wipes, and they even carried a faint scent of lavender.
Usually, I never noticed my own scent. If Gu Fan hadn’t leaned in and sniffed my neck several times, insisting that I smell better than any perfume, I’d have just thought he was sweet-talking me.
Maybe it’s because the weather’s gotten hotter and I’ve been sweating more?
Since crossing over, most of the time has been in the cool autumn or the cold winter. Now that it’s gradually turning to spring, things are a bit different from before.
After spacing out for a while, I finally came back to my senses.
There still wasn’t anyone nearby. During Qingming, everyone’s busy sweeping tombs and honoring ancestors. Only an unfilial descendant like me, who doesn’t think of my ancestors, would sneak off to this empty clearing to sit around idly.
I pulled up my slightly slipping white over-the-knee socks, making sure the sock band was tight and properly sunken in. Only after it didn’t slip again did I nod in satisfaction.
Luckily, today’s stockings were a thicker denier. I figured if the weather suddenly turned cold and I didn’t bring pants, I’d be in trouble, so I purposely didn’t wear the thin summer ones.
So even though my calves were damp with sweat, it didn’t bother me much. The only thing was, as I walked, the soles of my shoes made light “squelch, squelch” sounds. The quality of these women’s leather shoes I bought just isn’t as durable as sneakers.
Bumping my heels together, I took the shoes off, then pulled out the last pack of tissues from my skirt pocket. I spread a few sheets on the insoles to soak up the sweat and air them out a bit.
Changing position, I crouched on the long stone slab, hugging my legs and resting my chin on my knees, curling up into a ball just like a cat in my bedroom at home.
Thankfully, right next to this stone slab stood a flourishing tree with lush green leaves. I couldn’t tell if it was the clearing itself that was breezy, or if the rumor about “sitting under a tree lets you catch more wind” was true.
A refreshing breeze kept blowing over to me, making my cat ears on top of my head perk up and sway with joy in the wind.
They were so soft now, nothing like the tense and stiff ones I had back at home. Back then, I even thought I could just take them off and toss them into a snack bag as crispy, crunchy cat ears.
My toes, wrapped in white stockings, unconsciously stretched and curled. I stared blankly as they kept twitching on their own.
If only Gu Fan were sitting next to me, I could use “I’m so tired” as an excuse to prop my legs up on him, acting spoiled and begging him to massage my feet or calves. Otherwise, I’d say I can’t walk anymore and have to trouble Mr. Childhood Friend to carry me home~ Mmm.
Indulging myself in these sweet daydreams about the future, I pulled out my phone from my skirt pocket, unlocked the screen, and skillfully opened Gu Fan’s chat window.
He still hadn’t replied to my messages. The white-outlined little bear sticker that pats you on the head kept doing its duty, tapping on the chat interface for me, reminding Gu Fan to hurry up and reply.
It was almost noon—was Gu Fan still busy? Ugh, I really wanted to chat with him.
I’d pretend to act pitiful in the chat, hinting for Gu Fan to comfort me, then he’d knowingly send me a few selfies.
Of course, if Gu Fan actually pulled up his shirt and showed off his well-trained abs, I’d instantly be filled with motivation again and quickly save the pictures to my album.
Unfortunately, Gu Fan isn’t that “bold” of a rascal. Unless I specifically ask, he usually only comforts me with words or sends a few scenery photos as a compromise.
My fingers idly swiped across the screen for a while before I finally put my phone down, puffing out my cheeks and imagining myself as a frog, sulking as I glared at the fluffy canopy above.
Speaking of which, I really ought to thank my father.
My mind used to be all muddy like a swamp—obviously, I liked Gu Fan so much, wanted to stick to him all day, meowing and acting spoiled, begging for hugs or handholding.
But I was always bound by my timid nature, overthinking everything, wishy-washy to the point of missing good chances.
Clearly, as a young catgirl, all I needed was a bold attack to completely win over Gu Fan.