The moment I stepped out of the classroom, I unconsciously exhaled the stale air from my lungs. My body, as if finally relieved, released its fatigue, and even my walk looked a lot more weary and sluggish.
Sure enough, even after starting over, I still can’t bring myself to like school life. If only I could just fast-forward straight to living together with Gu Fan—how wonderful that would be.
Wouldn’t it be fine to just be a housewife and take care of the household?
Mm… well, it’s not like I’m saying I’m lazy or anything. It’s just that I feel like my energy and passion can only be fully unleashed in that kind of setting. If I had to put it in one phrase, maybe I’m a “born bride”?
All in all, staying at school does let me experience some of that youthful atmosphere, but honestly, it just feels unbearably boring.
Sometimes I can’t help but daydream about shooing all these people away. Even if Gu Fan isn’t here, I don’t want anyone disturbing my fantasies of the beautiful life we might have together.
Looked at this way, I really am not very sociable… maybe even a little neurotic.
I was lost in thought like that, and when I snapped back to my senses, I realized I had already drifted down the stairs and was quickly heading toward the parking lot.
Hehe, looks like my body is even wiser than I expected. It knows what’s right—why should trivial things be allowed to obstruct my steps? Hurrying to see Gu Fan is the only thing I should be doing.
With that thought clearing my mind, my heart, once tangled up in threads of “worry,” gave a few strong beats and snapped those threads apart.
Though a few remnants still lingered deep inside, as long as nothing unexpected happened, they wouldn’t have any chance to affect my mood before the day ended.
My steps grew much lighter. If not for the crowd of classmates around me making the space a bit cramped, I probably would’ve hopped a little and even hummed a tuneless song to express my joy.
The school parking lot was built quite large, but Gu Fan always had the habit of parking in a fixed spot.
I had long since memorized the exact direction, row, and column beneath the streetlamp where it was. I could practically find it blindfolded.
When I arrived at Gu Fan’s motorcycle, he hadn’t shown up yet. I glanced at the classmates nearby who were accompanied by their friends, squinted my eyes, and then lowered my head to stare blankly at my toes to pass the time—but my bulging school uniform jacket blocked my view.
Clicking my tongue, I silently averted my gaze, letting my distracted eyes wander forward, leaning back against the lamp post and idly kicking at the ground.
It was at times like this that I suddenly became aware of my own absurdity, and my heart felt complicated, unsure of how to even evaluate it.
It was like when you’re seriously deep in thought, and suddenly a handsome—or rather, beautiful—girl walks past in an alluring outfit, swaying in front of you.
The disruption makes your thoughts scatter into chaos. That was exactly my state right now.
Mmm… although, that “seductive girl” was me. And the reason my excitement was rising was because I was fantasizing about how Gu Fan might look at me if he saw my shameless figure.
From one thought to two, from two to three, and then all kinds of combinations began forming in my head. What started out as fairly normal consciousness quickly became crammed with a mess of fantasies.
Forced into desperation, I had no choice but to squat down, pressing my tail between my knees and occasionally squeezing it, while my hands grasped my trembling cat ears that were shaking from excitement.
Stimulating both ends at once—tail and ears—was the only way I could barely rein in my exaggerated imagination.
After all, I didn’t want to lose control before even seeing Gu Fan. I had to reduce the number of times I went off the rails, and continue shaping myself into the image of a dignified, gentle, and obedient catgirl.
Normally, no one would want their partner to be mentally twisted, right? Everyone dreams of being loved by a flawless prince or princess and growing old together.
That’s the kind of life anyone would want. Gu Fan hasn’t reached the point of being detached from worldly desires, so he should be thinking the same way, right?
Since that’s the case, I should disguise myself even more as a capable, virtuous wife. After all, I don’t know much, my mind isn’t that quick, but my ability to take action is pretty strong.
Besides, common sense is something you can accumulate slowly. Even if I’m kind of like a useless shut-in now, I can still make up for it.
As long as I manage the daily life well, I can still be helpful to Gu Fan, who’s focused on his work.
Hehehe… At some point, I had crouched on the ground, elbows resting on my knees, palms holding my cheeks, giggling in a daze.
Honestly, every time I daydream about married life with Gu Fan, I can’t control my facial expressions. It feels as if I’ve already experienced it all in advance.
In a way, I guess I’m pretty good at “enjoying” things.
Pulling my thoughts back little by little, I noticed the number of passersby had thinned, and only a few cars remained. Had I really been spacing out that long? Why hasn’t Gu Fan come yet?
Puzzled, I took out my phone from my backpack and saw a text message from Gu Fan a few minutes ago. He said the teacher had called him to discuss something, so he’d be late.
Oh right, Gu Fan is the vice class monitor… and also a member of the student council… Makes sense.
With such a good temperament and just the right touch in handling people, it really would be a waste for him not to be class monitor.
In my eyes, there doesn’t seem to be any duty Gu Fan can’t fulfill.
Usually, I only ever focus on how things will turn out between me and Gu Fan, or how they should turn out. I’ve almost never paid attention to how Gu Fan is doing in school.
After thinking it through like this, I suddenly understood the strange looks those classmates—who got along with Gu Fan—gave me.
A promising, outstanding student, being “corrupted” by an unknown, reclusive catgirl whose only merit is her big chest… If you put yourself in their shoes, yeah, that really would be irritating.
I can already imagine their thoughts: things like, “Can this gloomy, antisocial shut-in girl just stay away from Gu Fan? Doesn’t she have her own friends? Why is she clinging to him all day long? Wouldn’t it be better to mind her own business?”
Well… even though my defenses are usually pretty high, I can’t completely avoid being hurt by those words.
After all, I really don’t have any friends, nor do I have so-called “things of my own.” I just want to stick with Gu Fan, that’s all…
Lonely, I tightened my grip on the phone, staring as the screen lit up, dimmed again, and finally went completely dark.
I set it to auto-sleep after ten minutes, which means I must have been spacing out for nearly ten minutes.
My legs were starting to go numb from squatting, and without realizing it, I had clamped my tail in a way that bent part of it inward.
Sure, it still strangely sent waves of stimulation, but to keep myself from breaking it by playing around, I decided to tuck it obediently into my clothes, wrapping it snugly around my waist.