After hurling those vicious words, Frostsilver felt much more refreshed.
She looked at the iron golem before her—that instrument of torture—and hummed a tune:
“Once there was a little red dragon, greedy and strong♪ …”
“Once there was a little red dragon, greedy and strong♪ …”
At the banquet, the short Aurina sang the song while pulling Sophia through dance after dance.
Richard and the red-gowned lady had long finished their dance, but the two of them kept going without stop.
“No more, no more.”
Sophia gasped heavily, refusing once again: “Aurina, I really can’t go on.”
Aurina continued singing.
She reached the part where the dragon received Tiamat’s blessing, seized vast treasures, yet refused to give Tiamat her agreed share.
Sophia’s movements grew more and more deformed.
Now she was like boiled greens—limp all over, simply letting Aurina drag and lead her.
Sweating profusely, she turned her gaze to Richard and called: “Richard.”
Only then did Aurina stop.
Her head pressed against Sophia’s chest.
The two dragon horns pushed into the soft flesh, firmly fixing themselves against the scalp.
Sophia no longer cared about decorum—she leaned obliquely against Aurina, letting her share the weight.
Aurina shouted loudly at Richard: “Richard, I made your fiancée completely powerless!”
Everyone around laughed.
Richard laughed too.
It’s this reaction again.
This king should have known long ago.
Aurina found it boring and asked: “Sophia, do you want this king to help you back to sit beside Richard?”
He bowed to the emperor in salute, then suddenly leaped high in place, spinning mid-air, shouting: “Salute to the dragon-slaying warrior!”
With that, his eyes bulged wide, chest thrust so far forward it arched backward—like a downright fool.
He deliberately used the Hand of Tyr Knight Order’s salute pose, fist over heart, in a laughably exaggerated voice:
“Lord Richard, good evening!”
Somehow using magic, every person in the entire banquet hall could hear him clearly.
“Hahaha.”
The military nobles laughed openly without restraint.
They lived by martial ways—what need for politeness?
In their mouths, no woman present was spared.
Now with the emperor’s backing and overwhelming numbers, they let loose.
Unlike the unrestrained laughter of the crowd, the holy warriors’ faces turned iron-blue one by one.
“He’s trying to humiliate us.”
Richard said: “Let’s see what other tricks the emperor has.”
The Emperor of the Yanting Empire nodded to this clown.
A servant handed a lute to the clown bard.
“Ah~”
The clown bard bounced in place.
He walked in a bizarre posture—legs splayed outward like an upright-walking crab—hopping to the holy warriors’ table. In a high-pitched voice, he sang:
“Ah ah ah ah, pedophile♪ pedophile♪.”
Almost all eyes turned to Richard at once.
Somehow, Aurina was now sitting on Richard’s head, her two white-silk-stockinged feet dangling from his shoulders, thighs clamping his helmet.
“Little girl’s feet are small and soft and white!♪” The clown bard continued, a white towel draped over his shoulder. He grabbed it dramatically, rubbed it vigorously against his mouth, and inhaled deeply: “So fragrant, so fragrant, so fragrant!♪”
“Hahahaha!”
The military nobles pointed directly at Richard, laughing so hard they bent forward and backward.
Aurina watched the clown bard, not understanding what this noisy performer was doing. Propping her chin with both hands: “What is he doing?”
Richard patted her leg: “Come down quickly. Whatever you want to eat later, just tell me.”
“Okay.”
“Light body, soft voice, easy to push down!♪ No one knows I’m tiny♪” The clown bard sang, pulling at his crotch, peering inside with an exaggerated sad expression.
The crowd burst into laughter again.
So they’re saying Richard’s thing is tiny.
Turns out forearm-thick is tiny.
Tsk tsk, the strongest little insect is so pathetic.
Aurina covered her mouth and giggled “hehehe,” glancing at Richard.
She noticed his face looked extremely bad.
The clown bard did a forward somersault, sprang up from the ground, spread his arms, and sang loudly: “Only little girls think it’s thick♪ I love little girls♪ Pedophile, pedophile♪.”
He faced Richard directly—the provocation couldn’t be clearer.
“Brother Richard.” A holy warrior whispered: “What he’s saying…”
“No! I’m not a pedophile!” Richard burned with anger.
But many fingers pointed at him; whispers flew everywhere.
Though Richard wore a helmet with ear openings and magic to amplify sound, he heard plenty:
“Turns out he fancies that little young dragon.”
“She’s really pretty—must be great in bed.”
“Still talking about guiding the dragon to goodness—hehe, I bet he’s guiding her in bed, feeding her ‘goodness fluid.'”
“Hahahaha.”
Not just the military nobles—even the guild masters looked at Richard with strange eyes, freely cracking holy warrior jokes.
The orchestra played a melody matching the clown bard’s vulgar, lowbrow song.
Though the lyrics were crude, the tune was simple and catchy.
Before long, this song would spread from the banquet throughout the city, then via ports to settlements everywhere—tainting Richard’s reputation.
People loved gossiping about those on moral high ground, spreading filthy rumors about them.
The Emperor of the Yanting Empire showed a satisfied smile.
He felt immensely pleased with himself.
A single tune could defeat countless monastery quills—only a brilliant monarch like him could adopt such excellent advice.
Just as Richard’s face flushed red.
The clown bard suddenly knelt and kowtowed to Richard, wearing an exaggerated pleading expression: “Please, don’t chop me, great dragon-slaying warrior.”
Someone shouted: “He’s drawn his sword!”
A chain of laughter erupted: “Hahahaha.”
Completely ignoring that Richard and the others carried no swords.
But they wanted to believe Richard had one and was triggered enough to want to kill.
“He’s going to slay the dragon again!”
“Hysterical!”
“Hilarious—must be an impotent pedophile.”
Richard clenched his teeth, sitting motionless in his chair.
From beside him came the Haisha Port commander’s counsel: “Richard, don’t be impulsive. The more impulsive you are, the more ammunition you give them for mockery.”
“I know!” Richard growled low.
“Don’t speak, don’t rebuke—just treat him as nonexistent. Richard, this is a lesson you must learn. In such settings, a man must know when to bend and when to stretch.”
Why so many restrictions?
Clearly the emperor is wrong—why doesn’t even my own commander believe me and instead lectures me?
Richard burned with anger inside, body rigid, unmoving.
He knew that taking it seriously here meant losing—being seen as unable to take a joke.
Yet people would take this “entertainment” as truth. To counter, one could only retaliate with entertainment.
But none of them could sing and dance, let alone compose a counter-song.
“Pull his head off, pull it off.” Aurina bounced beside him, egging on: “The strongest little insect cannot be insulted!”
Suddenly, an idea struck Richard.
He recalled Aurina’s various feats—she always became the center of attention, wielding mysterious draconic magic.
Her singing could linger in people’s hearts…
Then…
“Aurina.”
Richard called her name: “One more all-you-can-eat meal. Whatever you say, I’ll make it for you—as long as you sing and dance and defeat that clown. You can do whatever you want.”
“Why should I?”
Aurina put hands on hips: “You dare command this king?”
“Most respected, great, supreme, one-who-slew-seven-in-a-single-blow red dragon champion, king of red dragon kings.”
Richard rattled off a string of titles from memory: “I beseech you—for this humble pack beast of yours—strike down that arrogant clown’s flame.”
Hearing the “strongest little insect” spout such a long list of honors, Aurina nearly floated to the heavens.
Trapped in this weak female body, yet able to make the strongest little insect yield to her—which dragon could achieve that?
None, absolutely none.
She raised her foot high—so high the soft white sole was visible—as if believing the higher the starting leg lift, the faster the sprint. She declared: “Piece of cake. A mere flashy little insect is no match for this king.”
The moment the words left her mouth, she dashed out, becoming a red whirlwind, circling the clown bard round and round.
The clown bard was astonished to find his eyes disobeying, chasing her figure in circles.
He grew dizzy and spinning.
Aurina’s tail whipped him again, and the clown bard rotated like a top.
“All you little insects.”
Aurina leaped onto the spinning bard’s head, shouting to all the little insects: “To witness this king’s singing and dancing—even if you die now, you die without regrets.”
Want to counter with the same method?
See if the monarch agrees.
The Emperor of the Yanting Empire directly raised his hand and pointed, commanding: “Blast her down.”
But at that moment, the orchestra struck the gong perfectly, drowning out his order.