Chapter 135: Not an Excuse

In the Original Work, Vigdis grew strong very quickly simply because she enjoyed wielding a sword.

But if today’s incident sparked a desire in her to become strong.

‘Could she become even stronger, and sooner than in the Original Work?’

The possibility was more than sufficient.

‘Hadn’t even Liolikin acquired the [Berserk] skill, which he never had in the Original Work?’

So, I had a hunch that Vigdis would surely grow even faster.

“Right. Since you have talent, you’ll reach that level soon if you work hard.”

“Thank you for the encouragement…!”

Vigdis replied bravely while wiping her tears with the handkerchief I gave her.

Although I couldn’t offer kind words of comfort or a warm hug…….

‘Anyway, she stopped crying, so wouldn’t this count as fulfilling my role as her public fiancé?’

I justified it that way and looked away from Vigdis toward the exit.

The plants blocking the path had already been cleared by the professors.

Seeing as they weren’t stopping students from leaving, it seemed they had already confirmed the safety outside.

To think their work efficiency suddenly spiked as soon as the Boss Monster disappeared.

It was so absurd I couldn’t even get angry.

‘Phew… Still, it’s better than them holding us back for an investigation instead of letting us go home. I should get out of here quickly before the Original Protagonist comes back and bothers me!’

Or so I thought.

When I was struggling to stand up on my own with my weak legs, I heard the voice of the Protagonist of Another Novel from behind.

“Karbaldr. How is Liolikin?”

“…The person in question is right here, so why are you asking me?”

“Well, you said you had to go check on Liolikin and forced me away without even comforting me while I was crying.”

Looking back, I saw Reysir Daudabina pretending to wipe his eyes.

He definitely seemed to be crying earlier, and he said so himself.

But perhaps because he had replaced his eyepatch with a spare, it wasn’t wet at all, and his face was so clean that he looked more detestable than pitiful.

‘Is he not ashamed to say he cried? Or is it the opposite—he’s embarrassed, so he’s joking around to act like nothing happened?’

Either way, I didn’t want to give Reysir a proper answer, so I just kept my mouth shut and made a ‘Hmph!’ sound.

However, Reysir didn’t get upset about being ignored.

Instead, he chuckled and reached out his hand to me.

Since the strength in my legs hadn’t fully returned yet, I did need someone’s help to stand up immediately.

But for some reason, taking the Original Protagonist’s hand to stand up felt uncomfortable.

‘Wouldn’t standing up by holding hands like a handshake look like a scene from a friendship narrative?’

So, I glared at the outstretched hand for a moment, ignored it, and stood up by pressing down on Liolikin’s shoulder.

Then, I patted Liolikin’s shoulder a couple of times before letting go completely.

I figured this would make it look like I was leaning on his shoulder to praise his contribution.

“He, hehe.. It seems Karbaldr trusts me more than Reysir.”

“…I’ll assume you did that to show that Liolikin’s body is fine.”

Listening to the two of them arbitrarily assigning meaning to my actions, I wondered if I should have just stayed seated until my legs felt better.

I failed to escape before the Original Protagonist approached anyway, so standing up was pointless.

While I was regretting it.

“Thank you, Young Master Karbaldr. You saved my life. Truly…, I don’t know how I can repay this debt.”

Hailga expressed her gratitude in an extremely polite manner.

She was acting prim because there were many eyes watching, but the sentiment in her words wasn’t fake.

She must know she wouldn’t have escaped death if I hadn’t stepped in, so it was only natural.

‘That’s why, besides Reysir, I wanted to avoid talking to Hailga too…’

Because the plants grown by the influence of Magicalization blocked the Auditorium exit.

Because I was checking on Liolikin, who had been blown away by the Boss Monster’s attack while protecting me.

And while waiting for Vigdis to calm down after her burst of tears.

In the end, I faced this burdensome situation.

If I said I wasn’t specifically trying to save her, I’d surely hear that I’m still awkward about receiving thanks.

Saying I just did what any decent human should do without needing to worry about it….

‘Is that too shameless of a statement?’

Simply because she didn’t die in front of my eyes.

Even though I know many people around Reysir will die in the future, I’m trying to turn a blind eye.

“…You’re stating the obvious. There’s no way anything you can offer would be at my level, right? Don’t bother bringing useless things as gifts claiming to repay the favor.”

***

After some thought, I gave an arrogant reply befitting Karbaldr’s character, tilting my chin slightly.

“Ah… yes…. Thank you so much for even considering my family’s circumstances.”

I thought she would look offended or disgusted.

Contrary to my expectation, Hailga let out a small laugh, almost a giggle, and spoke.

It was a reaction as if she had heard a funny joke.

She must have interpreted my words as those of a tsundere.

Realizing that, embarrassment washed over me.

This is all Reysir’s fault.

If he hadn’t preached the ‘Karbaldr = Tsundere’ theory to Hailga, she would have taken my words as an insult and never associated with me again.

“To be honest, I still can’t believe you saved me, Young Master. Even though we ate together every day and went out to play sometimes. I thought there was no direct friendship between us.”

“What are you trying to say?”

“So everything Reysir said was right…?”

“……”

‘See?’

It really is Reysir’s fault.

“I can’t offer you any help right now, Young Master. But I won’t forget my gratitude. Whenever I gain the ability to do so, I will surely repay the debt.”

“Repay that debt to your childhood friend instead.”

“But it was you who saved me, not Reysir, wasn’t it? Did you perhaps save me for Reysir’s sake?”

‘Maybe because she was almost a corpse today, she was speaking quite recklessly.’

“How could that be? I’m just trying to simplify the debt relationship. He saved me, just as I saved you.”

“Young Master. Unlike actual debts, debts of the heart cannot have their responsibilities or rights transferred.”

‘Ah, I guess that doesn’t work?’

Even though I expected it, I instinctively made a “Tsk…” sound in disappointment.

“Karbaldr. Do you think I saved you today?”

There were still many eyes watching us in the Auditorium, so even if he couldn’t openly tease me.

I thought he wouldn’t be able to hide his laughter, finding my words and actions amusing.

Unexpectedly, the expression and voice of Reysir, who cut into the conversation, were quite serious.

“The compensation for that will be delivered by my family.”

“Why are you saying that at this timing? Do you think I asked that just to confirm if I should demand compensation?”

“…….”

Of course, I didn’t think so.

If that were his intention, Reysir wouldn’t have such a stiff face.

He would have been smiling broadly, telling me to finally acknowledge him as a friend, adding that it was what he wanted most.

“If Hailga had died while I was in a panic, I wouldn’t have had the face to see her father. I would have been so sorry. And whether he forgave me or not, I would never have been able to forgive myself. You probably already know why, so I won’t bother explaining.”

I wanted to say I didn’t know, but I couldn’t.

Because in chapter 85, he confessed to me that he was afraid of people around him dying.

And was that all?

Two chapters ago, he even clung to me, whining that he had vowed never to lose a precious person again but almost did.

“You drawing the monster’s attention to save Hailga was truly dangerous and reckless. But…, I can’t criticize you for doing that. Because thanks to your actions, I was saved.”

I understood the part about not being able to criticize me.

Because if I hadn’t stepped in, Hailga would have died.

But….

“Saved? That’s not a word you can throw around so easily.”

“I know. But I have no other way to express it. I thought I had mostly overcome the fear of ‘that day.’ I was confident that if something similar happened again, I would be the first to fight. But, today I…………….”

Reysir seemed to be speaking fluently, but unfortunately, that momentum didn’t last until the end.

He vowed to protect his precious ones.

Vainly confident that he could.

He must be so ashamed of the fact that he was in a state of panic for quite a while that he couldn’t bring himself to continue.

“Back then, I could use the excuse that I was too young to do anything, but what about now?

You saw it too, how easily I killed that monster.

If I still couldn’t do anything because I was paralyzed by fear, what excuse could I possibly make?”

“……”

“If someone had died here today.

Especially if it was someone close to me…

I might have truly gone insane.

No, actually, I feel like I might lose it even now.

How could I fall into a panic at a moment like this?

I simply cannot understand myself…!”

He looked quite fine just a moment ago.

But now that I look, he was just pretending to be fine, acting like nothing was wrong.

He just wasn’t showing it.

“Panic isn’t exactly a symptom you can control with your own will, is it?”

“Do you think if you were me, you could just accept it and move on?

You couldn’t.

That’s why you tried to save Hailga at the risk of your own life.”

“I didn’t put my life on the line.

Liolikin was by my side, and I judged that if I stalled for time, the professors would step in.

I acted on the judgment that I wouldn’t be in danger.”

“So?

Did the professors protect you?”

“……”

It’s unfair.

My plan was truly perfect.

If only the professors had stepped in at the same time as in the Original Work.

Forget me being in danger, Liolikin wouldn’t have even been blown away by the Boss Monster’s attack.

“Sorry, I wasn’t trying to scold you.

It’s just that the image of the monster rushing at you keeps flickering before my eyes.

When I think that if I had kept my head straight, you wouldn’t have had to take such risks…

Haa—…….”

Reysir let out a deep sigh, brushing his face with his palm as if to hide his self-loathing.

“Anyway, what I’m trying to say is that no matter what reason I give, I can’t use it as an excuse.

When I was young, I felt powerless, and I escaped that by becoming strong through training.

But if I had lost someone precious again this time, I would have blamed myself and felt guilty.

And I would never have been able to escape that feeling for the rest of my life.”

Indeed, it was an undeniable statement.

There’s no need to even mention the content of the Original Work.

I can tell just by seeing him suffering and feeling such self-loathing even though no one died this time.

“So, thank you so much for saving Hailga…

and for staying alive without dying yourself…

for saving me from falling into the swamp of self-hatred.”

“Are you sure you haven’t fallen into that swamp?

You look a bit like you have…”

“I can overcome this much.

Because no one died, and I was able to save you with my own hands, I’m okay…

Oh, now that I think about it, I should say thank you to Vigdis too?

And to Liolikin and Yor….”

As expected of an Angst Genre novel protagonist.

It couldn’t compare to the Original Work, but Reysir’s current state didn’t look very good.

‘His speech feels a bit rambly too…’

He was trying to maintain his reason by controlling his emotions, but it seemed it wasn’t working well.

If I had known it would be like this, I shouldn’t have forced him away when he clung to me crying;

I should have comforted and soothed him until he calmed down.