Chapter 15: PTSD

After the three of them were seated in the barbecue restaurant, Hui Jin slumped onto the sofa, her eyes completely lifeless.

No matter what, she was mentally a forty-year-old person.

She couldn’t handle this kind of exhaustion.

Xia Che sat opposite, barely holding back a laugh as she said:

“Alright, Xiao Chi, stop tormenting Miss Hui Jin. Be careful she takes revenge by doubling your training later, you know?”

“Oh, it’s fine~”

Ye Xiao Chi hugged the electronic menu, ordering dishes while speaking with an air of nonchalance:

“Opportunities to hang out with Senior Hui Jin like this are rare. I’m just seizing the day, living for the moment. ‘Drink today’s wine today’—don’t you get it? I think you, Xia Che, completely don’t understand, huh?”

Xia Che really didn’t want to engage with her childhood friend’s terrible jokes.

She calmly took a sip of water.

“As for what comes later, I’ll leave that to the future Ye Xiao Chi. As long as the current me is having fun, that’s enough!”

The girl grabbed a lamb skewer from the just-delivered iron platter, still sizzling and glistening with oil, and stuffed it into her mouth with a big bite:

“Mmm! Barbecue after a tiring day is just the best!”

She grabbed two more skewers, first handing one to Xia Che, then offering the lamb skewer to Hui Jin:

“Senior Hui Jin, try it, it’s super delicious!”

Hui Jin looked at Ye Xiao Chi’s beaming smile and the oil glistening at the corner of her mouth.

A sealed memory, like a roaring train, sped past her eyes.

The surrounding noise suddenly seemed far away, becoming hazy.

The girl before her blurred, becoming very, very small, perhaps only eight or nine years old, with chubby cheeks and her mouth smeared with oil.

Because she was much shorter than Ye Qianqiu, she had to struggle to raise her arm to bring the lamb skewer in her hand up to his lips:

“Daddy, try it, quick! It’s super delicious!”

Ye Qianqiu sat on the sofa, stunned.

How long ago was this memory? Why was it resurfacing now?

He remembered it was about eight years ago.

After their family of three had gone to the amusement park, because the park’s restaurants were packed, they had randomly walked into a roadside barbecue joint.

Unexpectedly, the food was exceptionally good.

From then on, Ye Qianqiu often took An Wan and Ye Xiao Chi to eat there.

Wait, An Wan!?

He abruptly looked up, his gaze shifting to the other side of the table.

There sat the woman he had once yearned for day and night, loved deeply and boundlessly.

She had a head of jet-black, silky long hair and a pair of gentle, soft peach blossom eyes.

It was these very eyes that had once made Ye Qianqiu fall helplessly in love with her.

An Wan sat there properly, propping her cheek with one hand, smiling as she watched the father and daughter.

Noticing Ye Qianqiu’s gaze, she blinked, her willow-leaf brows slightly raised as she asked with concern:

“What’s wrong?”

An Wan’s voice overlapped with a familiar male voice.

This voice seemed to carry the force of reality, yanking Ye Qianqiu back from that momentary recollection.

Thus, Ye Qianqiu became Hui Jin again.

She realized she had been staring straight at Xia Che, who looked baffled, propping her cheek, yet her dark eyes held concern:

“Miss Hui Jin, what’s wrong? Are you alright?”

“I…”

Hui Jin felt her throat go dry. She shook her head:

“I’m fine.”

She averted her gaze, forcing a somewhat strained smile at Ye Xiao Chi:

“You two eat first. I’m not very hungry.”

She stood up, waving a hand at the two of them:

“I’m going outside to get some air. Just come find me outside when you’re done eating.”

With that, she walked toward the shop entrance with somewhat hurried steps.

Watching the girl’s petite, slender figure, Xia Che slowly put down her water glass.

Sitting opposite the two of them, she had clearly seen Hui Jin’s entire reaction.

Xiao Chi had merely offered a skewer to her, and she had frozen, then looked at him, her eyes filled with shock and… sorrow?

That emotion had flashed by.

Xia Che wasn’t sure if her judgment was correct.

Why would Hui Jin look at him with such an expression? Combined with her calling out his name before… it seemed certain she knew him.

But her gaze just now had been unfocused.

It didn’t seem like she was looking at him, but rather like she was looking through him at someone else.

Was it a scene triggering old feelings…

“Senior Hui Jin looks a little sad, doesn’t she?”

Ye Xiao Chi turned her head back, hanging it low, dejectedly chewing on the lamb skewer she had just tried to give Hui Jin:

“Could it be I went too far?”

If you’re reflecting, maybe stop eating, huh…

Xia Che sighed and said:

“Yep, it’s all your fault. Remember to apologize properly to Miss Hui Jin later, okay?”

“Ah? Alright…”

The girl channeled her remorse into appetite, starting to devour the skewers originally meant for Hui Jin.

Xia Che thought to herself, ‘It’s good to have an appetite, a good appetite is a blessing.’

……

The pedestrian street at night was bustling with activity.

Couples walking hand in hand, students dashing into the arcade after class, young girls in magical girl cosplay costumes parading down the street…

Hui Jin stood at the shop entrance, originally just wanting some air, but a sudden urge to flee welled up inside her.

So she started walking, strolling down the street alone, completely unaware that a pink-and-white figure was secretly following behind her.

“So this is the Magical Girl… Hui Jin.”

Sakura Blizzard compared the photo in her hand to the girl ahead, a soft pink smile curling her lips:

“Not even using a cognitive interference spell on herself? Hmm… interesting…”

Hui Jin walked aimlessly until she stopped at a red light at a wide four-way intersection.

She let out a breath, watching the white mist rise and then slowly vanish into the night.

Hui Jin had thought she was long past caring.

She thought that after so many years, she wouldn’t feel that heart-wrenching pain in her chest from remembering An Wan.

After all, Ye Qianqiu had died seven years ago.

How could a dead person feel pain?

But she was wrong.

When she picked up a corner of that sealed memory, the shadows of the past clung to her like a festering disease, like the most vicious curse, transforming into chains that tightly choked her throat.

Couldn’t breathe… limbs growing cold…

Hui Jin knew these were the precursors to a PTSD episode.

She quickly moved to a corner, pressing her back against the cold wall to avoid collapsing from the sudden weakness.

“Haah… haah…”

Her stomach spasmed.

Even though she hadn’t eaten much, a strong wave of nausea surged up her throat.

The girl hunched over in pain, tightly covering her mouth.

Cold sweat instantly soaked through her newly bought knit sweater.

Thump! Thump! Thump!

Her heart pounded like a war drum, threatening to burst from her chest.

In her daze, she saw the city before her plunged into a sea of flames, filled with broken walls and rubble.

A small stream of dark blood flowed past him, the severed limbs of civilians and heroes rotting amidst monster carcasses.

The air was thick with a nauseating stench of decay.

But Hui Jin didn’t even frown.

In her dreams, in every sleepless night, she would return here, to that hell on earth from seven years ago, witnessing the death of her dearest loved one over and over again.

She looked toward the end of the river.

In the pool of blood lay a girl, her dreamlike, pure white hair stained with red and black, like a morning glory blooming in mud.

Her original white dress was already tattered and ruined.

A huge, hideous wound gaped on her chest, blood gushing out as if pumped.

Hui Jin couldn’t see the girl’s expression clearly, but she saw her lips part slightly, blood seeping from the corner of her mouth:

“Qianqiu…”

“For me, for Xiao Chi…”

“… live on.”