The room’s cramped, but after a day of work under the blazing sun, it feels like paradise.
[Yo, you’re back! All clear!]
“No greeting from you?”
[Meow.]
“Yeah, right.”
[You my buddy or what?]
[You’re the boss.]
CatMan’s leveled up enough to pour his own food. Can’t open cans, but he can smash them.
“Then show some respect, punk.”
[Respect? Pfft… Hey, quit it with the shake, don’t rub my face!]
I grab his cheeks and pull, and he freaks out. Cats don’t curse their owners, so I heard it in English.
It was record-breaking hot today, but thanks to basic ice magic, I worked in relative coolness.
I came to Daejeon by train and stopped by a famous bakery near Daejeon Station—not Seodaejeon Station, which is a trek despite the similar name.
Seodaejeon needs a branch of this place, SSD, seriously.
[What, eating bread? You gotta eat rice!]
“I’ll eat tomorrow. I don’t hate rice.”
[Eat tomorrow and today! Koreans eat rice, not flour all the time…]
Normally, I’d just turn off the rice cooker, but with the AC on and a beer cracked open on my bed, I’m in a good mood, so I let the nagging slide.
I grabbed some octopus croquettes—protein-packed and spicy, my kind of snack—since they were still in stock despite it being evening.
Hm, the fairy’s leaves are clasping each other hesitantly, like she’s clapping. I’ve been feeding her formula, but she must’ve eaten all sorts before blooming as a baby.
Should be fine, right? Instead of crumbs, I break off a fresh piece of bread, the buttery, syrupy, shiny part, and place it on her pot.
The bread melts away, adding a sheen to the plant wrapping the fairy. She sparkles when she’s happy.
“Tasty, huh?”
I put the bread in the soil, but the fairy in the bud puffs her cheeks, munching away. It’s wild to watch. I’m smiling at her eating when—
[“Tasty!”]
“Yeah, good—wait, huh?!”
I spin around, but RiceCookerMan and CatMan just stare blankly. They both use telepathy, so no sound should come out.
“No way, you?”
I ask, but the fairy baby just cracks a sly smile, eyes half-open.
***
“What’s with the call?”
[Yo, Teacher Kim.]
“Why’re you calling?”
The loudest guy in the group chat suddenly calls.
[This jerk never calls! What, you pulling some ‘I’m ghosting you all’ crap?]
“I check the group chat, dude.”
[Talk, man, talk! Fingers broken?]
“‘Ugh, idiots, all dead,’ I wrote that yesterday. Dead yet?”
[Whatever. So, Teacher Kim, enjoying the break?]
“Yeah, got fired.”
This guy doesn’t read the chat. It’s been ages since I asked about unemployment benefits. All he says is, “So, when’s the high school girl?”
[Knew it. Dating a high schooler? That’s why you got fired, right?]
Ugh, idiots. When will they grow up?
Two years ago, I did my student teaching and got some popularity. The kids were half-joking, not serious.
They wrote me letters, I bragged about it, and these guys still bring it up.
“Yeah, sure.”
[…For real?]
“Jealous?”
[Stop lying! Wait, really?]
Really, my ass. Dumbass.
“Cut the crap. If you want a girl, play less games and go out.”
[So! We’re planning a Daechon trip.]
“Oh?”
End of summer vacation season. School’s starting soon, though I’m not on break.
[Let’s go. Shrimp and soju.]
“You guys get rejected for acting like idiots in front of girls. It’s fun to watch.”
[Hitting me with facts, coward.]
“But I’m tired of that scene, so I’m out.”
Obviously, going with them means no girls, just shrimp, soju, and dumb talk at a pension. It’s kinda funny, but still.
Leaving the house is tricky. They’re holding off monsters for “peace talks,” but it’s not a vacation for me.
Could be a two-front tactic.
[You avoiding us lately? Not even busy.]
“I wanna be busy, man. But I’m living off allowance, so I’m out for now.”
I’ve got money. Plenty, even. I want to hang with friends, but circumstances suck. Stuck at home, not busy, but I can’t leave for long. I’ll just say I’m broke.
[What, broke? Put it on my tab, idiot. I’ll skip your wedding envelope.]
Nice words, but you’ll never marry, so no deal. I’d repay if I got a wedding gift.
“I’m not that broke. Just anxious about being jobless.”
[Oh, yeah? Daechon’s got nothing anyway, so to save on lodging, how about staying in Daejeon?]
“What? Sleep where?”
[Your place. Daechon, Daejeon, same diff. Room for four, right? Chungcheong vibes.]
No way. My room’s rigged with sticky traps, electric fly swatters, a cordless vacuum by the gate, and a shield coming via customs by ship.
I’m gearing up to equip it and check out robot vacuums at an appliance store. I’m busy, and there’s no space.
“Dude, then Yeoncheon’s in Gyeonggi, so it’s basically Seoul? Like commuting from Jeon ruins to Gangnam?”
[Suspicious. You hiding a girl at home or what?]
Always with the girl talk. He’s decent if he skips that. No choice.
“Yeah, I’m living with someone. Don’t come. Get a clue.”
[…Huh?]
Living with the gate.
“And she gets anxious if I’m gone overnight.”
I’m the anxious one.
[For real? You traitor, that time with the long hair and lip balm on your pillow—]
This jerk remembers the dumbest details.
“You recall that well. Anyway, that’s why no. Come at lunch, I’ll buy you bread.”
[A high school girl? That’s why you got fired? You crazy bastard, you okay? What’s your plan?]
“Crazy jerk.”
No point arguing further, so I hung up. These guys have barged in before, but that was when my old place was public knowledge.
This place hasn’t been shared. It’s a secure studio with a first-floor auto-lock code only residents know.
Unless they hire a PI, my idiot friends won’t invade.
[Living together? Huh? What?]
I hear a toilet lid drop and a question. The woman in 202 must love eavesdropping. Is she peeking through a hole in the wall?
***
“Wow, they make stuff like this now?”
Turning Mecard is wild. For my inanimate defense tower strategy, robots are unmatched.
To build a structure to trap and beat attackers as I envision, Lego’s the best bet. I came for a robot dog and toy cars for the hit-and-run strategy, but toys are a whole new world.
Mom never bought me toys. Dad got me a Nintendo DS early, though.
“Spread BB pellets on the floor, they step on them, slip, and roll into each other…”
Planning ways to mess them up is fun. Demons stepping on BB pellets, tumbling like on a unicycle, crashing into each other.
“Hm…”
Sadistic thoughts keep spiraling, so I calm down. A teacher raised around school violence has a warped mind.
The shield’s still in shipping, so I considered a toy shield but passed and shopped more.
“Star candy?”
While grocery shopping, I see Byeolbbobbi candy. If they bring another dragon’s egg, maybe I’ll offer star candy as tribute. Picked some up.
“Gum, hm.”
Another idea bubbles up, but I smack my head. Spitting chewed gum in my room as a trap? That’s psycho, not human. I bought a chocolate brownie kit, though.
Starting late August, I’m tutoring Young-sook’s daughter, the retaker. I’ll test how much sugar-fueled Intelligence buffs boost her grades.
Sikhye from RiceCookerMan or brownies are my options. Might eat some and study myself. With healing magic, I’m set.
Med school, here I come. Rather than dodging the FDA and Ministry of Health as a shady healer, med school’s the move.
I return and open the door. Beep beep beep beep. Ding. That sound’s so comforting.
“Oops, sorry!”
What the—? A white-haired woman with white eyes is at my door, so I shut it. Room 203, code 4796. “This is my place?”
Forget that—why’s there a human-sized woman? On second thought, she didn’t look human.
Her fashion was so bizarre, even a Milan model wouldn’t wear it, and white hair with eyes whiter than white?
[Mrowww!]
Cat cries keep coming, so I reopen the door. Others in this studio keep cats, but this sounds like CatMan. I open it again.
It’s CatMan, with [Lightning Dash] above his head, charging at the white-haired woman. He kicks off the wall, lands a cat punch, bounces back, and hits with an [Electrify] cat punch.
“He’s kinda good…”
Better than I thought. But a human-sized entity?
“Hey, what—?!”
As CatMan frantically pummels her, the woman, unfazed, blows a breath. CatMan’s encased in ice and drops to the floor.
He’s not dead—eyes still moving—but he’s immobilized. This is bad. Emergency. House be damned, I’ve got money.
I summon a kitchen knife and fly swatter from my inventory, grip them in my left hand, and swing at the back of her head with my right.
Crash!
I focus to avoid breaking the house, aiming only at her. She shatters like glass.
<massive exp gained>
My level jumps 20 at once. But no “defeated” message. No remains either.