Chapter 37: Reality and Catharsis (3)

“What is it you wanted to say?”

If you call someone over, you should at least say something.

Choi Geonhyeong called my name, then clamped his mouth shut.

Was he embarrassed, or did he just call me over with nothing to say?

Joo Taegang and Choi Geonhyeong are polar opposites. I’d love to seat the two of them at the same table just to watch what happens.

With any luck, I might get to see a fight break out.

“If you don’t have anything to say…”

“I just wanted to check if things were alright with the Writer.”

“With the Writer?”

I tilted my head, and Choi Geonhyeong nodded.

“That Writer is a good person, but sometimes, I think, a bit… maybe a little confused? There have been misunderstandings before. The mood was fine during the shoot, so I didn’t mention it, but I just wanted to check.”

“Ah…”

I guess the way the Writer looked at me during our first conversation must have set off Choi Geonhyeong’s radar too. If even the oblivious Choi Geonhyeong noticed, just how obvious was it?

“It’s fine now.”

Choi Geonhyeong asked again.

“Now?”

“No, it’s not like that. He actually said a lot of nice things to me.”

Most of his advice, if you filtered it properly, was actually quite good.

‘For a total rookie, that wasn’t bad advice.’

Besides, if you ask me if he bullied me—well, I cut things off before it got to that point, so nothing really happened.

“I see…”

What surprised me more was Choi Geonhyeong’s reaction.

I know better than anyone that Choi Geonhyeong isn’t the type to step up for others.

He rarely smiled or started conversations with others on set, simply because he wasn’t interested in them.

With that in mind, I used to think that pre-return me wouldn’t get along with such an FM-type like Choi Geonhyeong, but the time we spent acting together wasn’t so bad.

At the very least, I could act without thinking too much around this actor.

It’s less tiring than being around people who meddle in other people’s business.

“So it was alright, huh.”

After thinking deeply for a while, Choi Geonhyeong spoke up again five minutes later.

“If you ever feel like someone’s misunderstanding or confused next time, let me know. I’ll say something for you.”

“…What?”

Seriously. What?

Choi Geonhyeong looked me straight in the eye.

Whoa, I know that look.

That’s the look a senior gives when they care for a junior.

“You’re talented.”

“Is that… necessary?”

“You’re really good. It’d feel bad if you got misunderstood for nothing.”

Why do you care though?

Of course, if I saw Choi Geonhyeong saying, “Hey, this guy’s really talented. I vouch for him!” it’d be pretty funny.

Not exactly the kind of ‘refreshing scene’ I wanted, though.

“People are free to misunderstand. Besides, didn’t you say you thought the same thing at first?”

“No, well, not to that extent…”

Choi Geonhyeong cleared his throat, sounding a little guilty.

I shrugged.

“It’s just how it is. When someone who doesn’t seem that talented or hardworking suddenly grabs a spot everyone wants, they’re bound to be disliked. I feel the same way.”

It hurts more to see someone you don’t know get ahead than someone close to you.

Because we don’t know anything about their struggles or life.

That’s true for me, too. I’m only human.

“Of course, in my case, I’ve got both the skills and looks.”

At my words, Choi Geonhyeong let out a relieved sigh and patted his chest.

“That’s more like you.”

…

“Anyway, I’m really fine. No need to worry about me.”

Yeah, just act like the Choi Geonhyeong I knew before my return.

Why are you suddenly trying to act like a senior now?

It’s not like you’ve returned like me.

“When it’s not your business, you should think carefully before stepping in to help, sunbae.”

That was advice from me, as a senior in life, to Choi Geonhyeong.

After all, I died once. That’s something Choi Geonhyeong can never experience.

Even if it seems a bit rude, it can’t be helped.

My soul’s older than yours.

Choi Geonhyeong gave a faint smile at my words.

“Yeohu, isn’t that what I should be telling you?”

“Me?”

He’s saying I butt into things that aren’t my business?

First time I’ve ever heard that.

“I don’t think I’ve ever helped someone else without thinking about it.”

Choi Geonhyeong pulled out a wet wipe from his pocket and wiped off the sweet fake blood from his hands.

“Actually, not long ago, I got an apology from an actor. He said he’d misunderstood me. But he also told me the person who set him straight was you.”

That guy from the parking lot?

‘I did say he should apologize, but he could’ve just let it go.’

He actually told him himself, huh.

Is he clueless or just too honest?

Doesn’t seem like the best idea to me.

‘Well, maybe he’s just sincere.’

“It was the first time someone came directly to apologize for misunderstanding me, so I was grateful to both him and you. I apologized too. Honestly, I’m the one who should have treated him better.”

“…”

“Yeohu, you helping me didn’t benefit you at all.”

Well, that’s—

“That was, like you said, something that didn’t help you at all. Plus, you’re just debuting, with no connections to back you up.”

That’s just because I already crashed my life once, and in my second round as an actor, I have to find another way to survive so I don’t die again.

It’s not because I’m nice or a pushover.

I just didn’t want to repeat the mistakes I regretted in my previous life.

That’s all.

But that’s just me. You’re different.

“I’ve seen new actors get bullied and just let it slide. I thought, well, I survived on my own, so they should too. If you can’t even handle that, why join this industry? That’s what I thought.”

Choi Geonhyeong looked at me straight on.

He seemed pretty moved.

I felt a twinge of guilt.

All I did was something easy for an actor with a bit more influence than a bit part—nothing special.

The one who deserves praise is the person who honestly reflected on his mistake and apologized to you.

“But after getting help from someone with less experience than me, I couldn’t just ignore it. Realizing that all I learned from my life was to avoid things made me feel so ashamed.”

…

Should I be honest?

Right now, I feel even worse than before my return, or when I first regained my memories.

So bad I almost want to retch.

‘If only it doesn’t show on my face.’

Why do I feel so terrible in a heartwarming moment like this?

Even if you don’t understand, it doesn’t matter.

You’ve never returned, after all.

Choi Geonhyeong gave an awkward laugh.

“Thank you. You gave me a chance to reflect on myself.”

This guy.

What is it with him, admitting his faults so easily?

That’s something I only realized after dying.

No, even now, I haven’t fully accepted it.

Sometimes I still think I was right.

But you apologize so easily, change so easily, move on so easily—then what does that make me, left behind, all rotten inside?

Self-loathing wells up to my throat.

All the lessons I learned by paying with my life, you picked up just from seeing me do a good deed once.

Maybe I should’ve just kept living the same way.

Stayed cold on set, ignored everyone else. Just lived like that.

Annoying bastard.

I didn’t really have anything to say to Choi Geonhyeong’s heartfelt words, so I just mumbled something.

“Yeah. Sure. Let’s say that’s how it is.”

Just then, a new comment popped up from Joo Taegang sunbae, giving me a perfect excuse to change the subject.

Of course, the pettiness in my voice wasn’t entirely sincere.

“What’s up, what are you two talking about?”

Just then, Seon Ji-yoon returned and lightened the mood. Thank goodness.

Nice, Seon Ji-yoon.

“What’s this, what? Why’s our kid’s face look so glum? Sunbae, you didn’t make our kid cry, did you?”

“Ji-yoon, why is Yeohu your kid…? You’re the same age.”

“That’s because he can’t drink more than me!”

“…”

Nice canceled.

The poster shoot and magazine interview finally wrapped up in the late afternoon.

And of course, despite there being no schedule after this, my messages from Jeong Yun-woo had piled up.

[Jeong Yun-woo: Yayayaya]

[Jeong Yun-woo: I know you’re done for the day.]

[Jeong Yun-woo: Did you think no one would notice?]

[Jeong Yun-woo: Get over here now. I’m with your siblings.]

My siblings?

[Who are my siblings.]

[Jeong Yun-woo: If you want to know who your siblings are, hurry to this address below.]

[Yellow Portal Map: ○○-ro, DD-dong 12-1, 1st floor]

As I was considering whether to ignore Jeong Yun-woo, a message came from Ha Jeban too.

[Ha Jeban: Is Jeong Yun-woo always this noisy? On SNS, he looked pretty serious… I think his mental age is younger than mine.]

So Ha Jeban is the ‘sibling’ Jeong Yun-woo is talking about?

Why is Ha Jeban even with Jeong Yun-woo in the first place?

[Ha Jeban: And I’m not the only one. Lee Yeongbin’s here too.]

Sigh.

Lee Yeongbin and Jeong Yun-woo.

Those heavy drinkers, and little shrimp Ha Jeban, together?

[Don’t drink, just wait for me.]

[Okay]

After replying to Ha Jeban, it was time to say goodbye.

The photographer approached me first and extended his hand.

“You did great at today’s shoot. You’re the best rookie I’ve ever seen.”

Of course. I’m not really a rookie.

“Every shot was an A cut—it was hard to choose. Honestly, hiring a model with not a single B cut makes my job tough.”

I gave him a business smile I never would have managed before my return, and gripped his hand firmly.

Like a rookie actor hearing praise for the first time.

“Really, sir?”

The moment I heard my title change from ‘photographer’ to ‘sir’, he seemed even more pleased and nodded vigorously.

He probably thought I had no idea what he first thought of me.

Didn’t matter.

As long as I play my part in society, that’s enough.

This life, I’d resolved to play that part well.

He spoke, still excited.

“Yes, I’ve done hundreds of photo shoots, but I’ve never seen a rookie actor as skilled as you. Honestly, I want to work with you again. So… even if people misunderstand, hold on. You’ll prove yourself—Jeon Yeohu!”

It was rare for a photographer to praise an actor this much.

After all, he sees good-looking, capable celebrities all the time.

Probably his guilt made him overreact a bit, but I didn’t care.

If word of his praise for me spread online, nothing could be better.

Park Min-tae, who knows what I was like at first, will probably be surprised.

Well… change isn’t always a bad thing, right?

I beamed.

“Thank you, sir. I’ll do even better next time.”

I could feel the staff’s eyes bouncing between me and the photographer.

You all saw that, right?

Spread the word.