Chapter 49: Shopping Center

Shopping center…

It’s been a long time since I’ve come to one.

Standing beneath a large tree adorned with strings of colorful lights, I glanced around.

The shopping center was intimidatingly huge.

I’ve always disliked such spacious public places — usually, picking up essentials from small alleyway shops was enough for me.

The last time I came here was back in elementary school, when the school required us to buy a specific textbook.

I didn’t dare go into such a large place alone, so I asked Gu Fan to help me buy it.

I waited at the entrance for quite a while.

Which means…

I’ve grown this much, and I still don’t know what the inside of a shopping center looks like.

If it were before, I might have been too scared to go in.

But now, with Gu Fan by my side, I can muster the courage to explore.

With every breath, my nose felt cold.

The wind had picked up a bit.

I stomped my feet in place to warm up — the thick tights I wore under my skirt weren’t quite cutting it.

When will Gu Fan get here?

I’m getting a little impatient.

I kept looking toward each of the shopping center’s entrances, imagining Gu Fan suddenly appearing out of nowhere to surprise me.

Originally, Gu Fan had planned to give me a ride here, but I didn’t want him to go out of his way, so I came on my own first to wait for him.

He’d specifically reminded me not to arrive too early — that the weather was too cold, and I shouldn’t freeze myself.

I’d only remembered that after leaving the house a full thirty minutes early.

If he asks about it later, I’ll just have to pretend I forgot.

I glanced at my phone. Still on time. Gu Fan usually arrives about ten minutes early.

Absentmindedly, I scrolled through my phone, opening unfamiliar apps only to close them right away, letting my thoughts drift aimlessly.

Ding dong—

Suddenly, my phone buzzed along with a crisp notification sound.

I checked the message.

It was from Shiratori’s contact ID.

“Are you feeling okay today? I heard you took the afternoon off.”

When I saw that message, I didn’t feel like Shiratori was genuinely checking in on my health at all.

Instead, it felt more like she was using that topic as an excuse to start a conversation — one that was clearly aiming elsewhere.

The fact that she knew I, someone who hardly had any friends, was absent from school…

It meant she was keeping a close eye on my movements.

“I’m okay, just resting at home. About to take a nap.”

A wave of irritation rose in me for no real reason, pushing me to lie to her.

Even someone as clueless as me could sense that Shiratori had ulterior motives when it came to Gu Fan.

I’ve already tried my best to convince myself not to meddle…

But I still couldn’t help feeling resentful. So, I lied.

Ding dong—

A new message came through. It seemed Shiratori had given up on making small talk — instead, she got straight to the point and revealed her real reason for contacting me.

“Rest well. Um… if possible, could you ask Gu Fan what kinds of things he likes? We’re planning to surprise him.”

“Sure, I will.”

After replying, I immediately put my phone on silent.

I didn’t want to see any more of her messages.

Being pushed around when it came to anything involving Gu Fan… it just rubbed me the wrong way.

I stood by the entrance, brooding silently, until I spotted Gu Fan walking toward me, backlit by sunlight and dressed in a windbreaker.

In that moment, all my gloomy thoughts dissolved in an instant.

Whatever — today, I’m going to enjoy our time together, shopping with Gu Fan.

“Zhi Nian? You’re early.”

He looked a little surprised.

I had prepared a neat little excuse for this moment, something casual and practiced.

But maybe because of Shiratori’s earlier message, I ended up blurting out something completely different.

“I just… wanted to see you sooner. I like that soft, sweet feeling of waiting for you.”

This was a feeling deep from my subconscious, desperate to be released, spilling out from my mouth without any thought or filtering.

By the time I realized what I had said, Gu Fan was already looking at me with a gentle smile.

Ugh…

I had once again unwittingly said something embarrassingly intimate.

I crouched down on the spot, frustrated, covering my head with my hands.

Clenching my fists, I tapped my skull a few times, trying to clear my head—to stop babbling nonsense.

Gu Fan greeted me normally with some polite small talk, but I suddenly felt my emotions surge and blurted out a taboo I’d been hiding inside for a long time.

As Gu Fan’s friend, I shouldn’t have said something only couples would say.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, Gu Fan, just pretend I was daydreaming just now. It was a slip of the tongue. Don’t mind me, don’t mind me.”

I whispered my apology quietly—I wasn’t sure if Gu Fan even heard it.

I squeezed my eyes shut tightly.

My brain felt full of sharp spikes named anxiety, pushing against the walls inside my head, making it ache terribly.

I don’t know why I always do these foolish things, but somehow I instinctively reject such intense feelings, even though that’s exactly what my subconscious most wants to express.

When I was once again crushed by my own emotions, a large hand gently covered my cat ears and the top of my head.

Warmth seeped into my brain, softening the sharp points of anxiety little by little.

“Zhi Nian, don’t always get lost in your own world.”

I slowly opened my eyes and saw Gu Fan crouched before me, his expression unusually serious.

He spoke these words to me in a very earnest tone.

I lowered my gaze, this time carefully choosing more polite words before cautiously looking back up at Gu Fan.

“Gu Fan, do you really not mind the nonsense I said just now?”

Gu Fan smiled, rubbing my little head.

The tingling sensation made me exhale in comfort.

Then he gently took my wrist and helped me stand up.

“Yeah, don’t worry about those things. Let’s go shopping.”

Being led by Gu Fan into the shopping center, my mood gradually settled with the steady feeling of my feet on the ground.

Looking at Gu Fan’s sharp figure in his trench coat, my tearful frustration completely vanished, replaced by a newfound courage to move forward.

So I quickened my pace, not only catching up with Gu Fan but also turning back to smile at him.

“Will you let this not-so-perfect girl take you shopping?”

Gu Fan blinked, a beautifully curved smile tugging at his lips.

“Hmph, suit yourself.”

Gu Fan always somehow pinpoints the reason I’m unhappy, then casually dissolves it into nothingness.

Sometimes I feel like I’m too troublesome, too emotional.

Normally, I shouldn’t have been so worked up just now.

But Gu Fan is willing to tolerate me…

With that thought clear in my mind, I was immediately filled with a thick sweetness.

I opened the hand Gu Fan held — though he only held my wrist, he gently circled it with his thumb and forefinger, not pulling hard, and that alone filled me with a deep sense of security.

“Gu Fan, how about trying some donuts?”

Passing by a familiar dessert shop, I stopped and looked at him.

His warm amber eyes gazed at me quietly, like a calm, mirror-like lake, before a stone fell and ripples spread out.

Gu Fan nodded and gently led me inside.

“Just so you know, if the girl leads the way, the guy has to pay.”