Beyond the iron gate, a carriage awaited for the journey to the cathedral. It was the final farewell directed towards Leonora von Harkenberg from “this side,” and within it, acting as intermediaries, were members of the orphanage with whom the princes were acquainted — Bruno and Lena.
However,
“Leonora!”
Before boarding the carriage, she was called out, causing Leonora to turn around suddenly. Standing there was a dignified elderly woman with elegant white hair and kind verdant eyes. She was Lena’s grandmother, Emilia.
With a basket in hand, Emilia smiled warmly at Leonora. “You must be hungry on the way, right? So, I’ve prepared plenty of your favorite dishes for you.”
“Emilia-sama…”
Leonora hesitated with her words, closing her mouth halfway. She had already spent two intense months with the couple, bidding farewell thoroughly. Towards the end, Emilia had regained her composure, and Leonora had returned to the academy reassured.
(Except with Emilia-sama… It’s a bit difficult to face her…)
Leonora, who could usually detach herself quite easily in friendships, had this one weakness when it came to her. The emotions she poured into her friendships, the warmth and affection Emilia showered on her, seemed somehow different. Those feelings, to which Leonora had no immunity, were mysterious, profound — and incredibly comforting to her. So much so that she would almost forget the rule about not stealing.
(Even though she’s Lena’s grandmother…)
She didn’t want to take advantage of her fake self. Simultaneously, she didn’t want to see Emilia cry. Leonora had chosen to depart from the Duke’s household rather than the academy for that reason.
“Look here. You like anchovies, don’t you? So, I made plenty of pie for you.”
But she still said such words to Leonora. As she opened the cover of the basket, she pointed at the pies with a golden crust.
“Emilia-sama—”
“But there’s plenty of sauce too, so be careful not to spill it on your dress. Today’s dress is white, so be extra cautious.”
Before Leonora could say anything, Emilia gently interrupted her. Despite blinking rapidly, she managed to maintain her smile. “We have plenty of spare dresses at home, but it won’t be the same from now on. You’ll have to be careful.”
“Emilia-sama…”
“Hehe, what should we do with those dresses? There are so many, really, so many. I wanted to dress you in them… I made so many, believing that you were alive, even before we met… and… you’re… here…”
Dresses that complemented blond hair with blue-gray, brunettes with soft cream colors, and flaxen hair with verdant hues were tailored as if in prayer, even before the colors of their hair and eyes were known. She wanted to clothe her granddaughter, born in exchange for her daughter’s life, in warm attire.
“I wanted to show you the midsummer meadows! The beauty of autumn evenings, the warmth of winter fireplaces! Anchovy pies, chicken stews… warm dishes like that, eating together, laughing… teaching you how to make them… together! I wanted to… be together more…!”
Suddenly, the basket slipped from her hands and fell heavily to the ground. Emilia hugged the girl tightly, tears streaming down her cheeks onto her shoulder.
“I should never disparage the precious spirits of light that saved your life…! But! I can’t help but wish that such spirits would disappear from this continent…! To take away… such a lovely, lovable you, who always smiled at us, sang so charmingly, changed expressions so quickly, listened to our stories…!”
The rest was drowned in sobs, incomprehensible. They embraced each other tightly, so much so that Leonora’s eyes also welled up with tears, not just misted over but actually formed droplets and rolled down her cheeks. Though her purple eyes were quick to moisten, shedding tears in public was almost a first for her.
(Oh… She sees me as… a real “family.”)
It melted something within Leonora, which had been rigidly set like a shell, and gently seeped into the softest part of her heart.
Emilia loved her not simply because they were blood-related, nor because she was a granddaughter. Not because she had attractive black hair and purple eyes. Not because she could be useful or bring in money. Emilia just liked spending time with Leonora, without expecting anything in return, simply because she shared her time with Emilia herself, not Lena, — but the person within Leonora, named Leonora.
As a family, she loved her.
Suddenly, a voice resurfaced in her mind.
“Oh, spirits, I am grateful.”
It was from many years ago. A child’s voice, unaware of the coldness freezing her heart.
Quietly addressing Emilia, who had teary eyes, Leonora gently spoke, “I am grateful. For meeting someone who could fill this cold heart that had frozen unnoticed.”
It was an unexpectedly flowing sentence, drafted not just during her side job but even before she went to bed.
“To protect this miracle, I dedicate my whole being to the noble light of the spirits.”
Ultimately, she realized at some point that such miracles never occurred. She had long forgotten those words since then, as they were of no use. But now, murmuring softly, Emilia looked down at her with moistened eyes.
“Leonora…”
Their grass-green and amethyst eyes met. Leonora took a deep breath and put strength into the arm around Emilia’s back.
“May the radiance of blessings be upon me—”
Calling someone other than a real parent with such an endearing term was prohibited by Hannah. Hannah was Hannah, not her mother. Cruel as it may seem, that line must not be blurred.
Remembering Lena, Leonora silently apologized. For stealing what belonged to her, for allowing herself to steal. But at this moment, Leonora wanted to call the woman in front of her this way.
“—Grandmother.”
Not Emilia-sama, nor Madam. It was the first moment when the girl called this woman “grandmother.”
“Leonora!”
Emilia, noticing the change in address, widened her eyes. She sobbed again, tightly hugging her granddaughter.
“Leonora! Leonora! Oh, Leonora!”
“Grandmother. We… are a family. Right?”
With a hesitant tone, the girl asked, and Emilia nodded repeatedly.
“Yes! That’s right! That’s right!”
“Then it’s okay. If we’re family… no matter how far apart we are, even if we can’t see each other, surely… we’ll still be connected.”
As the girl whispered, Emilia suddenly straightened up. Then, staring deeply into her granddaughter’s eyes — gradually, she raised the corners of her mouth.
“…You’re right.”
There was still a tear-streaked, small smile. However, in her grass-green eyes, a faint light of hope, absent until now, began to flicker.
“…I love you.”
Hearing those words — and understanding that they were undoubtedly directed towards “herself” — Leonora quietly held her breath.
Because that was a phrase a child whispers to a parent as they fall asleep in a warm bed. Or a phrase a child innocently utters to the father who lifts them up after they’ve fallen and cried. For someone like herself, who lacked close relatives to call their own, it was a word that should never be forgiven. But…
Will it be forgiven?
Can I even desire it?
Can I even desire something other than money earned legitimately from now on?…
Her lips trembled. In her heart, she apologized to Hannah. For the time she mistakenly called her mother and was seriously corrected. For being reminded repeatedly not to steal, that it was only okay to pick up what was left behind. She would be going against her teachings now. To these two women in front of her, and if possible, to Hannah too. Because these were words she desperately wanted to say to them.
“…I love you too.”
The words she uttered for the first time with a hoarse voice seemed to blend effortlessly into the air once spoken. The words, so devoid of any ulterior motive, that promised and elicited promises of unconditional affection, simply reverberated in her eardrums.
Another tear fell from Emilia’s emerald eyes. Without saying anything more, she hugged Leonora tightly again, pouring strength into her embrace. They held each other tightly, tears wetting their cheeks as they leaned against each other. Like exchanging body warmth, they closed their eyes for a while, and then — they separated, laughing with each other.
🥹
Truely beautiful. Thanks for the wonderful chapter.
I came to laugh but damn am i feeling the feels