Chapter 8: Staring Down the Spotlight

Normally, getting hazed would make anyone angry. But I guess I’m not normal.

‘Hazing feels this exhilarating?’

“…Uh.”

He looked slightly flustered.

He probably thought I’d get mad or leave.

But I’m abnormal. My first taste of hazing felt like a fresh thrill, proof I was becoming a real actor.

With a slight smile, I grabbed my script and pulled a pen from my bag.

Hiding my face slightly behind the script, I glanced at Im Hoon.

Im Hoon, legs crossed as if flaunting their length, was getting his makeup done. Not sparing me a glance, he radiated a vibe of “I don’t care about someone like you.”

‘Well… maybe that’s a relief.’

If he’s like that, I don’t have to act friendly either.

As I opened the script, an iced Americano appeared in front of me.

“Im Bada-nim! I’m Im Hoon’s manager!”

Im Hoon’s manager handed me the drink.

“Oh, thank you. I’ll enjoy it.”

“No problem! It’s a little bribe to ask for your cooperation…”

I looked up at the manager and asked, “A bribe? Is there something you want to say?”

“…Hoon isn’t usually this prickly. I’m sorry.”

“Oh…”

I hadn’t heard rumors of Im Hoon having a bad personality. If anything, I’d heard he’s shy but warms up to people he’s close with.

“He’s probably jealous of you, Im Bada-nim.”

“Of what?”

“His acting…”

Im Hoon’s manager trailed off.

“Noona!”

Im Hoon sharply called out to his manager.

‘He’s like a Chihuahua—wary and snappy.’

“Hey, hey! Coming!”

“I’ll enjoy the Americano. Thanks.”

As I took the drink and looked up, my eyes met Im Hoon’s. He glared at me before turning away.

“Im Bada-nim, he’s jealous…”

Recalling those words, I stared at the back of his head.

He’s jealous of me?

I was the one jealous of him.

He debuted as a lead and kept landing lead roles. Acting can be improved with effort, lines can be memorized with effort. But starting as a drama lead? That’s not something effort alone can achieve.

A fleeting role doesn’t stick in the public’s memory. Even with the attention I’m getting now, I’m still an actor who could be forgotten quickly.

If I told him about my past struggles and my inability to memorize even a single line properly, what expression would he make?

Would he still glare like that?

As I returned to my script, the assistant director entered the actors’ waiting room.

“Uh… Im Bada-nim?”

“Yes?”

“Something’s come up…”

What’s going on?

★★★

I’d seen plenty of mishaps on set as an extra, but this was a first.

Noen, who’d reportedly dropped out, suddenly showed up, demanding to take back the role.

Noen was passionately insisting he wanted to do this character despite his overseas tour.

“Ha…”

In this awkward situation, Director Kim Ha-sin rubbed his eyes, looking frustrated.

“I never said I wouldn’t do it,” Noen argued.

“You let articles announce your withdrawal. How’s that different from quitting?”

“I’m sorry about that. But the article was released by my agency without my consent. And I’m here before shooting started…?”

Seeing Director Kim hesitate, Noen tried to smooth things over with a smile.

“No, we’ve already got another actor. We can’t just reverse it.”

“But Park Hae-in was originally my role. It’s not even filmed yet, so I can just take it back.”

“You made us rewrite the entire script with the writer until dawn yesterday and change the role. Now you show up saying you’ll do it? Do you have any sense or not?”

“But my manager called you, didn’t they?”

Director Kim, checking his phone to confirm, looked displeased.

The Youth 2015 staff, whispering among themselves, started glancing at me. I’d cut my long hair for this shoot.

‘Are they worried about me? Or do they pity me?’

I thought for a moment, but soon realized it was neither.

“So who’s shooting it?” Noen asked.

“Ugh, we’re already 30 minutes delayed. At this rate, the sun will set.”

They just wanted to shoot the drama quickly.

Amid the chaos, I sat in a staff chair, reviewing my script.

Why bother with that guy when I could focus on the character’s emotions or lines?

“Oh!”

Noen finally approached me, noticing me.

“Hello!”

“…Hi.”

“What do I do because of me?”

I quietly watched Noen, who was all smiles, approaching me.

I wanted to hear his nonsense first.

“I heard from the staff earlier. You cut your hair.”

“…..”

His tone was apologetic, but his eyes held not a shred of guilt or remorse.

“I feel so bad, what do I do?”

“……”

“If I’d come earlier, you wouldn’t have had to cut your hair. I heard long hair is precious to actresses.”

His words brimmed with confidence that he’d take the role. Listening to his empty, hollow apology felt pointless.

I closed my script and looked up. “So, are you done talking?”

“No.”

So talkative. I nodded for him to continue. Perhaps annoyed by my lack of reaction, his wide, innocent eyes narrowed.

“Ha, you don’t even want to talk to me?”

“This isn’t a conversation; it’s more like a one-sided notice.”

“No, it’s a conversation. Is it because you’re new and can’t tell the difference?”

His tone dripped with mockery.

‘…Wow, it’s been a while since I’ve been treated like this in front of others.’

Noen was definitely pissed. Not because I wasn’t responding, but because a “lower-tier” actor dared to talk back.

‘Celebrity syndrome.’

I’d occasionally met people like this on set—those who lose manners and foresight, consumed by celebrity syndrome.

“Hmm, is that so?”

As I responded nonchalantly, Noen let out a scoff, his gaze raking me up and down menacingly.

Just as he opened his mouth to speak, a voice interrupted.

“What’s going on? Why’s the shoot so delayed?”

Im Hoon, clearly irritated by the unexplained delay, approached with a scowl. Noticing the director on a serious call, he seemed to look for the assistant director.

“Hoon-hyung!”

Noen, who’d been glaring at me like he’d bite my head off, suddenly ran to Im Hoon, waving.

“…What’s with you? Didn’t you say you weren’t shooting?”

“I’m back! Let’s shoot together, hyung!”

The jerk Noen vanished, replaced by a sweet younger brother Noen with an innocent smile.

If he acted like that, the public might actually praise his acting.

“…Didn’t you say you were out?”

“No! My agency messed up and released that article after my overseas tour.”

“…So?”

“I’m doing it!”

“You said you didn’t want Park Hae-in because the role’s small but demands heavy acting. You even texted me about it. So why do you suddenly want it now?”

Noen squirmed under Im Hoon’s questioning.

‘He’s so blunt…’

Is that okay? But in the drama world, popularity dictates status.

‘Well, Im Hoon’s more popular than him, so it makes sense.’

“Oh, uh, I reviewed the script on the plane during my overseas tour, and the story was so good!”

“Acting practice?”

“…Of course I practiced, hyung.”

His trembling voice and hollow response made it obvious there was another reason, clear to anyone.

Im Hoon, visibly annoyed, furrowed his brow and glanced at me over Noen’s shoulder.

“She acts better than you.”

“I-I know!”

As Im Hoon let out a heavy sigh, Director Kim Ha-sin, finishing a call, exploded in anger.

“Noen! Did you release another article saying you’re back on Youth 2015?”

“…Huh? Yeah.”

“No way! How could you release an article saying you’re back without consulting me? Do you have any sense? Any at all?”

I checked the article amid the whispering staff.

[Idol Noen Returns to Filming.]

[Idol Noen Asks Fans to Watch His Growth as an Actor…]

He likely coordinated with his agency to release the article before coming to the set.

That’s why an agency matters.

They handle what actors can’t.

I clenched my fist, grinding my teeth. If Director Kim reversed his decision, I’d have no choice. The director’s word is final.

But…

‘This feels unfair.’

I didn’t want to lose another acting opportunity due to someone else’s interference. Plus, failing the sub-quest made it even worse.

Im Hoon, as if struck by a good idea, strode over to Director Kim and whispered something.

The director’s eyes widened, and he patted Im Hoon’s shoulder twice—a gesture I knew meant satisfaction.

“There’s still time.”

“How about having both act?”

Me… and Noen?

★★★

Director Kim proposed that both Im Bada and Noen shoot the Park Hae-in scene from episode 1 of Youth 2015 with Im Hoon.

Since the role required delicate emotional acting, he’d choose based on their performance.

Honestly, Im Hoon didn’t care who got picked. No, he’d prefer Noen. He didn’t want to be compared to someone who acted well and hear he was lacking.

“Then help out, Hoon.”

“Me?”

“You’re acting with them anyway, right?”

‘That’s true, but…’

Though his popularity was rising, Im Hoon still lacked confidence in his acting. Being outshone by a rookie like Im Bada bruised his pride.

‘How is a newbie like her so good?’

“Hurry up, what are you doing? Get ready.”

After a brief hesitation, prompted by the director, Im Hoon nodded and headed to the camera setup.

Director Kim looked between Im Bada and Noen, asking, “Who’s going first?”

“…Uh.”

The bold Noen who’d loudly declared he’d shoot was gone, replaced by someone dodging eye contact like a nervous transfer student.

“I’ll go first.”

Im Bada, who’d been reviewing her script, raised her hand and stepped toward the set.

In the slightly chaotic moment, Im Hoon sidled up to her and said, “You’re not getting picked anyway, Im Bada-ssi.”

“……”

“Why do it?”

At her question, Im Bada’s eyes curved into crescents.

“Who knows? Maybe the rock that hits the egg will crack. And… just having the chance to act is enough.”

Her expression and tone radiated an aura that said, “I’m different from you.”

Her genuine love for acting, not just as a job, pierced Im Hoon like a needle.

Without a word, Im Hoon returned to his spot. Responding felt like admitting defeat.

‘Me?’

Ridiculous.

“Standby!”

Director Kim’s shout rang out.

“Action!”

Creak—

The rusty rooftop door opened with a squeak.

At the sound, Im Hoon, lying on the rooftop, turned his eyes toward Im Bada.

Im Bada entered, unbuttoning one button. Until she opened the door, her eyes were lively and round, but upon spotting me, they narrowed like a flounder’s, turning into a dark, deadened gaze.

Even with the script, her eyes held no trace of emotion, unreadable.

Im Hoon swallowed hard.

To anyone watching, she was…

‘…Park Hae-in.’

Park Hae-in himself.