Originally, we were just aimlessly wandering around.
But once we had the clear goal of buying a Christmas gift, we started paying more attention to the nearby shops.
We also began sharing with each other what we imagined a Christmas gift to be like.
However, neither of us are the type to have strong desires or obsessions.
We don’t really have particular things we like, so it wasn’t easy to quickly decide on what to buy.
Walking around the shopping mall, we would occasionally stop to take pictures at nice spots as a way to record the day.
Gu Fan didn’t force me to be the model.
At each spot, he simply asked if I was interested in taking a photo.
When there were too many people around, I hesitated and declined.
Only when the area was more empty did I feel comfortable enough not to worry.
Later, after we finished our milk tea and looked for a new spot to visit, I thought about it more carefully.
Wait a minute—why should I care about other people’s gazes?
They have nothing to do with me or Gu Fan.
There’s no need to mind them at all.
After thinking that through, I calmly appeared in the frame of that sky-blue mini camera.
I let Gu Fan choose all kinds of backgrounds for me.
Everyone has a little vanity deep down.
Seeing a photo of myself as a somewhat cute catgirl, I couldn’t help but feel a little burst of joy.
Plus, Gu Fan wasn’t lost in his own world this time.
After each photo, when we huddled together to look through the pictures in the mini camera…
Gu Fan would always look at me very seriously.
And he’d use sincere words to praise how beautiful and photogenic I looked in the pictures.
I couldn’t help but laugh every time.
Who wouldn’t start to lose themselves in such repeated and varied compliments?
I almost started to believe I really was the flawless, perfect catgirl that Gu Fan described.
Well, once I came back to my senses, I had to recognize reality.
Gu Fan was just being polite and kind when he complimented me.
It’s fine to be happy for a moment, but if I take it seriously, wouldn’t I just become a clown?
I glanced down at myself.
Honestly, aside from having a slightly larger chest, I don’t think I have any other advantages over girls my age.
My looks are just… not bad at best.
They’re still far from the kind of beauty I imagined—where one look would be enough to make Gu Fan fall head over heels.
Ugh, I don’t know why, but lately I’ve started caring more and more about appearance, temperament, body figure—these external traits.
If I really am just plain and average in all those areas, would Gu Fan still care about me this much?
Would we even have gotten back together?
I closed my eyes and played out the scenario in my head.
A cold, cruel malice seeped deep into my bones, then spread toward my chest.
I coughed a few times and abruptly opened my eyes, my cheeks feeling ice cold.
I was a little scared…
The scene I imagined filled me with such despair that I nearly forgot how to breathe.
I looked over at Gu Fan.
He was still focused on sorting through the photos on his camera.
I quickly pulled out a mirror and checked my face.
Phew… it was okay.
Just a bit pale from the scare, but not quite sickly.
I let out a deep sigh.
Squinting my eyes slightly, I crossed my arms and hugged my chest.
The pressure gave me a faint sense of safety, however fragile.
Whenever I know an unpleasant scene is coming up in a movie, I always skip ahead using the progress bar.
If it’s in a book, I just flip past those pages quickly.
But this shameful fantasy was like it had been coated in fluorescent paint.
Even if I shoved it into a dark corner and tried not to look at it, it still glowed in its own way—slowly pulling my attention toward it.
In the fantasy I had created, I was plain in every way.
I wasn’t even a catgirl.
In that version of myself, I didn’t even have the courage to get close to Gu Fan.
Because in my imagination, I deeply believed that an ordinary, plain girl had no right to approach a perfect boy as warm as the sun.
I suddenly felt that my current condition was actually not bad at all.
At the very least, I still had enough proud “capital” to stay by Gu Fan’s side. Anyone else who wanted to compete with me would have to think twice. Only someone like Shiratori, who was pretty and had a good personality, might stand a chance.
Unexpectedly, after that daydream, my self-confidence had actually increased quite a bit. I wasn’t sure whether that was a good thing or a bad thing.
I quickly pulled myself out of those messy thoughts, turned my eyes—which had dried a little from the cold wind—and blinked to moisten them as I began scanning the surrounding shops.
Gu Fan seemed completely focused on how to take more flattering pictures of me. He didn’t seem to pay much attention to what was inside the stores.
Even when I asked him what kind of gift he liked, he just smiled and said, “I like whatever you pick for me.”
I really wanted to believe that he meant it, but based on what I’d read online, that was a classic line guys use when they’re trying to brush girls off—so my level of trust in it wasn’t very high.
I couldn’t turn myself into a peerless beauty whose every photo looked like it belonged on a magazine cover, so I decided to focus my energy on picking the perfect Christmas gift.
As for what Gu Fan liked, I wasn’t too sure yet.
I only knew he really liked cats, but as for catgirls, his interest seemed kind of average.
Even when we passed by some catgirls during our walks, I never noticed him paying any particular attention to them.
Does Gu Fan like lewd things?
Tch, hard to say. The internet says all guys are creatures led by their lower halves.
But based on my observations, Gu Fan’s gaze only occasionally lingered on my legs, chest, tail, or cat ears for a moment, and even then, his expression didn’t really change much.
The feeling I got…
It felt more like his body was instinctively driven to glance at those places.
Since I couldn’t figure out what Gu Fan liked… then I might as well try to find out what he needed right now.
A gust of cold wind suddenly blew through, and the particularly empty corridor of the shopping center made things worse.
With no shelter to block it, the wind slipped through the gaps in my clothes, and even though I was dressed warmly, I couldn’t help but shiver.
Huh? Wait a second, I think I’ve got an idea.
Looking at what Gu Fan was wearing, the cold wind had made him hunch his shoulders just a moment ago too.
The thin jacket he had on couldn’t cover the goosebumps rising on his neck.
Seeing that, I immediately knew what kind of gift I could give Gu Fan.
“Gu Fan, I’ve decided what I want to give you for Christmas.”
I quickly walked over to his side and intentionally grabbed the collar of his jacket with both hands, pressing my not-so-warm body against his arm.
After all, Gu Fan was a boy. When his elbow bumped into something soft, his body clearly stiffened for a second.
He paused what he was doing with the small camera in his hand, then stuffed it into his pocket with his right hand.
Then, as always, Gu Fan looked at me with a calm smile, but the left arm closest to me never moved.
“Have you picked the store already? Or have you just decided what you want to buy?”
“It’s the latter. Let’s take our time and look around.”
Actually, we had just passed a clothing store earlier, but I pretended not to notice it and pulled Gu Fan along to continue walking through the corridor.
I just wanted to use this opportunity to talk to Gu Fan a little more…