Lunch was nothing more than a plain bowl of dry noodles, tossed with satay sauce and some everyday ingredients.
The taste was decent, but nowhere near worth the kind of price you’d expect from a fancy restaurant—way too overpriced.
Zhinian sat quietly to the side, eating her lunch in silence. Normally, she’d watch me eat, slowly and lazily, always looking for something to chat about, but today, she was uncharacteristically quiet. It seemed that little accident earlier had really hit her hard; she didn’t even feel like talking.
When I finished my meal, tidied up the plastic containers, bowls, chopsticks, and spoons into the trash bag, and came back to the living room, the black-haired catgirl was brewing a pot of hot tea, her expression blank. It was obvious she wasn’t used to making tea—her fingers were flushed red from the heat, but she still stubbornly poured me a full cup of rich black tea.
When I walked over, Zhinian straightened her back nervously, turning the tea cup so the handle faced me, her voice trembling as she spoke.
“P-please… please enjoy!”
“Why are you so tense? Are you worried I’ll get mad about the tea and eat you instead?”
“Mmm?! N-no, that’s not it, I just wanted Gu Fan to take a break and have some tea to get rid of the aftertaste, that’s all…”
It was clear Zhinian didn’t often have guests at home. She must have learned this tea-serving routine from the internet or from her mother, but she lacked experience. Even her grip on the teapot was all wrong—if she poured much more, she’d probably end up with blisters.
“Let me do it.”
I took a small sip of tea, then sat down right beside Zhinian, smoothly taking the teapot from her hands.
When I’m bored at home, I’ll sit and drink tea, zoning out or scrolling on my phone. Pretty much everyone in our region likes tea—Zhinian was the rare exception.
The fabric sofa felt a bit hard, and a faint layer of dust covered it. The teapot and the coffee table were the same; it was obvious Zhinian and her mother didn’t use the living room much.
Even the wall-mounted TV that took up half the wall was draped in a gray dust cloth, and the pure white remote on the shelf below had a layer of dust caked on it.
These days, most of the TV’s functions have been replaced by smartphones. Whether it’s catching the news or chasing dramas, people do it on their phones. Still, when you’re cleaning the house, you always end up wiping down the TV, that symbol of family togetherness.
Zhinian, sitting close beside me, hung her head gloomily, her cat ears and tail barely perking up, nothing like the energetic greeting she’d given me before.
If our relationship were already truly intimate, I’d definitely try more aggressive methods to cheer her up. But as it stood, we were just close childhood friends. No matter how many ambiguous things happened between us, as long as we didn’t actually confess, we couldn’t mark this relationship as irreplaceable.
“Zhinian, did you really oversleep this morning?”
“Uh? Ah…”
It was just a casual probing question. I thought it would be like tossing a pebble into a calm lake—maybe a few ripples, then everything would settle. But unexpectedly, it stirred up more than I thought.
Zhinian’s delicate face twisted with embarrassment, her willow-leaf eyebrows knitting tightly as she struggled to reply. Her fingers fidgeted with the pleats of her skirt, crumpling it.
I calmly observed her reactions out of the corner of my eye. I poured some of the deep red tea into her light pink cup, handing it over as I continued to press the topic.
“Could it be, Zhinian, that you were just playing a trick on me? Since it’s April Fool’s Day, you decided to pull a little prank?”
Sure enough, once I used a bit of reverse psychology, Zhinian snapped to attention. In an instant, she perked up and gave me a sharp look, like a hunter spotting prey.
“Mmm?! N-no, never! I’d never lie to Gu Fan! I always, always put Gu Fan first in my heart, I would never dare deceive you. I don’t even care about April Fool’s—holidays are just an excuse to give Gu Fan presents, not something to be led by the nose by! Don’t ever think I’m the kind of bad woman who’s full of lies…”
She squeezed my left arm tightly, soft as a cotton ball, locking me in place like a pride of lions hunting together and leaving their leader to finish the job.
Zhinian leaned in close, her words sounding apologetic, but the emotions in those crimson eyes made me think if I refused her now, she’d push me down on the sofa and bite my neck on the spot.
Her cat tail, sinuous as a snake, had somehow wound itself around my waist, tugging me closer, awakening a long-dormant instinctive sense of danger.
Ever since I got seriously ill a year ago and stopped interfering with bullying at school, I hadn’t felt my heart pound so violently from a sense of risk.
I took a deep breath, trying to suppress my restlessness, but my hands on Zhinian’s shoulders were still trembling.
Dealing with punks in middle school was one thing, but what I felt from Zhinian this time was mixed with something unique to adolescent boys—a hazy, dreamlike thrill. It took me several swallows to calm it down.
“Take it easy, Zhinian, I’m not blaming you. We’re just sitting a little too close.”
In her battle-ready state, Zhinian was a little dazed—not like the usual bashful, foot-stomping response when I called out her behavior.
She still refused to let go of my arm, instead tugging at me like a child begging for candy, her gentle tone revealing an unwavering resolve.
“Are you really not mad at me? Really? Can you promise? You’re not just saying that to make me happy?”
I’d picked up a lot of social tricks on my own, but girls like her could still be a handful.
Not that I disliked her—far from it. I just couldn’t fall back on generic scripts or formulaic lines to brush Zhinian off. That would be disrespectful and dismissive. I needed to choose my words carefully, craft the best response to soothe the little catgirl’s heart and untangle her thoughts.
She might be a bit clueless about daily life, maybe even a little clumsy, but when it came to emotions, her sensitivity was beyond my expectations. If I tried to brush her off, she’d know instantly.
“Of course I’m not blaming you, Zhinian. It’s just that you seemed a little down, so I wanted to tease you. Sorry, I was too abrupt—have some tea first.”
Softening my tone, giving her a way out, and shifting the subject—a full-service approach. Zhinian immediately calmed down, releasing my arm and obediently picking up her cup to sip her tea.
After a few sips, she seemed to relax, and finally admitted the real reason she was out of sorts today.
“Gu Fan… I probably can’t go out with you during the Qingming holidays…”
“What’s up? Going back to your hometown for the ancestral rites?”
When I asked, Zhinian shuddered, her crimson eyes widening as if she was frightened. She bit her lip and replied,
“…Sort of.”
She was hiding something. I was sure of it.
But since Zhinian didn’t want to talk, I wasn’t about to pry. Her mother cared for her, but she was always too busy to spend much time at home. Zhinian’s living expenses and allowance were always taken care of.
Her mother might seem cold on the outside, but deep down she was very loving and would never put Zhinian in danger.
As for why Zhinian looked scared, maybe her relatives back home weren’t kind to her, or maybe it had to do with her father, whom I’d never met. But that wasn’t for me, a once-critically ill childhood friend, to worry about…
“It’s fine. I’ll be heading home for Qingming too. It’s a three-day holiday, so if we both have time on the last day, we could still meet up at a milk tea shop or a restaurant.”
I poured another cup of black tea for Zhinian, but it was already losing its rich color and flavor.
A few days ago, Mom had asked if I wanted to go back home together for the ancestral rites, but I’d turned her down since I’d already planned a train trip with Zhinian for the Qingming holiday.
Thinking back, every year around this time, Mom would insist I stay home and study instead of returning for the ancestral rites. Last year, right before the high school entrance exams, she even locked me inside and wouldn’t let me out.
Then, less than half a month later, my uncle ‘unexpectedly passed away’, and that changed both Mom’s and my personalities. My younger uncle soon after bought a house in Flower City and moved away from town—I could guess he didn’t want to see Mom anymore.
In a way, our family’s turning point was all thanks to our estranged uncle.
Lost in thought, I tipped out the last of the tea and dumped the leaves into the trash.
Since Zhinian couldn’t make it, I’d go back home too. My younger uncle would probably visit the funeral home to see my late uncle—I could take the opportunity to ask about the will my uncle left behind.
After all, it was that will that helped Mom change her controlling ways, and let me shed my angry, wild side to put on this fake social mask again.
Cradling the glass cup, the pale gold tea inside shimmered as I moved my hand, reminding me of that golden retriever back home, tail wagging and smiling.
How old was it now? It was already there when I was little—must be getting on in years. I should visit while it’s still around, and maybe see if that mysterious temple hidden deep in the mountains is still there.
Thinking this, I tilted my head back and finished the cooling tea in one gulp.
*****
Hand-holding… had become routine for us now. Gu Fan no longer minded my sneaky attempts to reach for his fingers. Instead, he held me openly, wrapping me in his broad palm.
It made my heart skip a beat—like Gu Fan’s sudden gesture was going to make it leap right out of my throat.
We walked down the commercial street, clinging to each other like a real couple, hand in hand, even interlocking our fingers.
I really didn’t know what Gu Fan thought of me. Were we really just childhood friends? I didn’t believe he was truly that dense.
Online, girls and boys always say that pure friendship between them is impossible—it always develops into something more.
And… I’d even watched some slightly questionable science videos, claiming that the smarter the boy, the stronger those kinds of feelings were. I did have some advantages over other girls my age—plus, I was a unique catgirl. There’s no way Gu Fan never thought of me, or dreamt about me.
If I could, I’d love to catch Gu Fan and get to the bottom of it.
For now, though, I preferred to play it safe and simply enjoy the warmth of Gu Fan’s hand in mine.
Even though it was a hot season, that warmth made my bones and muscles feel so comfortable, without any of the irritability that came with the heat.
Maybe this is what they call happiness?
My overactive mind drifted back to old rumors I’d heard as a kid—“if a boy and girl hold hands, the girl will have a baby,” or “if a boy and girl hug, they’ll become husband and wife.”
Back then, I was so young, I even fantasized about doing those things with Gu Fan, tying him to me forever.
I didn’t have the right hardware at the time… but now, I could daydream a little. Could this happiness really turn into a cute little baby, making Gu Fan responsible for both me and the child? Hmph~
When that time came, I’d be at home raising our kid, earnestly practicing my cooking skills. Once Gu Fan finished work and came home, I’d show up before him in a pretty apron, the perfect wife and mother, and say that classic couple’s line—
“Gu Fan, do you want to eat first, take a bath first, or…”
Or maybe… would you rather hold and hug your cutest, prettiest, sweetest catgirl wife? Is hubby thinking strange thoughts? That’s a no-no… You’ll have to wait until after dinner to even consider it~