The May night breeze brushed against my cheeks, as if it carried with it the lingering warmth of the day.
The old, mottled street lamps cast a dim yellow halo above our heads, like little suns floating in the darkness.
Night always descends quickly in a small town. Compared to a big city, it feels as if the nighttime hours are deliberately cut short; before midnight even arrives, the suburban streets are already pitch black, not a single street vendor’s cry to be heard.
Only a few scattered shops hang their signs by the roadside, but their faint lights are hardly different from fireflies when set against the tunnel-like darkness of the street.
I held Zhi Nian’s wrist as we walked along such a suburban path, basking in the warm night wind, always feeling a sense of unreality.
“If the gods truly are watching over me, then I hope… Gu Fan can be safe, never fall ill again, stay healthy all his life, and never feel discomfort or pain. That’s the first wish I want to make.”
The black-haired little catgirl by my side had spoken to me her first wish to the gods exactly one minute and twenty-four seconds ago.
To be honest, I’ve seen questions like that on the internet often, and when I was young, I’d sometimes fall into similar fantasies with friends, chatting and laughing as if we were already living in some idyllic Eden.
But reality is always cruel and ruthless. After we parted ways and returned home, one glance at the heavy homework and workbooks on the desk was enough to drag my soaring heart back down, every cell of my body swept by helplessness.
Human nature loves to fantasize. Even knowing how beautiful we imagine things, in the end we’re still crushed by the weight of life, yet I still can’t help but wonder, from time to time, what sort of journey life would be like along a timeline I never lived.
If I’d always been perfect, never argued with anyone, always taken good care of my clumsy catgirl childhood friend, could trust me without reservation, and, most importantly, if that hard-to-cure illness had never appeared at all…
That kind of life, I’d imagined more than once when studying late into the night.
That’s why, the first question I asked the old woman who’s good at divination during the day was, “How long can I live in good health?”
I actually wanted to bluntly ask if I’d ever get another serious illness that would drain time and money and burden my family and Zhi Nian.
But after some thought, I figured if I was ever beyond cure, I’d probably choose to end things myself rather than drag things out, so asking how long I could live healthily seemed more appropriate.
I still remember how surprised the old woman looked. Even though I could only see the lower half of her face beneath her cloak, I could still sense her hesitation.
“Are you sure you want to know? The answer may not be what you hope for.”
She was silent for a long while before forcing out those words, but just hearing her say that, I already had a feeling.
“Please, tell me. It’s important to me.”
“Sixty-five.”
“……”
When I heard that answer, my first reaction wasn’t sadness, but a kind of irrepressible joy.
After all, my expectations had already been set so low—I never thought I’d live past fifty, maybe even die in my twenties or thirties if I was unlucky.
I’d already decided that if the old woman told me I wouldn’t make it past fifty, once I got back to my small town, I’d cut off ties with Zhi Nian immediately and never drag things out again.
But now, this neither-high-nor-low age left me, after the initial joy, with an indescribable sense of conflict.
As I lingered in the memory from earlier today, a soft murmur rose from the girl at my side.
“Gu Fan… um, do you not like my wish? Do you think I’m childish?”
“How could that be? I was just amazed that Zhi Nian’s wish was all for me. I can’t help but feel a little ashamed.”
“Ah, it’s nothing special! Of course, Gu Fan taking care of himself is most important, and I also want Gu Fan to stay healthy. That’s normal. As a catgirl, I’m just a little hardier, um, not that I’m saying Gu Fan isn’t healthy, I just purely wish for you to stay well and not get sick, that’s all, meow… What am I even saying, don’t mind me, just pretend I’m being silly.”
Zhi Nian’s cat ears folded back, making her look like a round-headed kitten sulking. But the one she was angry at was probably herself.
For Zhi Nian to babble on, then lower her head, her lips pursed in self-blame as she twisted the hem of her skirt until it was all wrinkled.
If we were standing even closer, I could have felt her overly lively cat tail swinging hard at my leg from time to time, making my shins ache.
“Zhi Nian, don’t belittle yourself like that.”
I didn’t know whether to laugh or sigh. In the end, I went with my first instinct, patting Zhi Nian’s small head and gently pinching those irresistible cat ears.
Maybe it was just psychological, but Zhi Nian’s cat ears, as a catgirl, actually felt even better than a real cat’s.
Not only were they soft and plump, the fur was thicker than any cat’s, reminding me of a knitted cat plush my uncle gave me when I was a kid—the dense, intricate stitches felt almost exactly like this.
With her ears pinched, Zhi Nian’s cheeks instantly flushed bright red.
Though she lowered her head to hide her face, I could still see, from the movement of her hands and the little gasp escaping her tightly pressed lips, that she was slipping into that dazed state again.
“By the way, what’s Zhi Nian’s second wish? Can you tell me?”
Taking advantage of her dazed moment, I slipped in the question I’d been wanting to ask.
Zhi Nian let out a few confused little whimpers, those ruby eyes shining with a thin mist, still bright even in the dim light.
“Um, I want to be with Gu Fan, always, always… together…”
After being coaxed into voicing her second wish, Zhi Nian’s body trembled suddenly. The cat ears that had been enjoying my touch sprang out of my hand, standing straight up like soldiers at attention, watching me seriously from a safe distance.
The black-haired catgirl who had looked so lost in my touch a moment ago seemed to become a different person, back straight, eyes sharp.
“Um, Gu Fan, don’t get the wrong idea, I just mean we should always be childhood friends, never lose this rare bond, always keep in touch. I didn’t mean that kind of ‘together’.”
“Mm, I know what you mean.”
“…Really?”
Even though I answered along with her words, seeing her squinting eyes and the way she bit her lip in frustration, she really didn’t look happy.
I could tell that Zhi Nian was too shy to admit her true feelings, trying to comfort herself with the opposite meaning, and at the same time hoping I wouldn’t misunderstand.
If I were the kind of dense, overly gentle protagonist from an anime, maybe I really wouldn’t get what she meant.
But unfortunately, I’m just a perfectly ordinary person in the real world, and my comprehension skills are at least average.
“I guess I don’t totally get it, but I know Zhi Nian really treasures our relationship. Even if you didn’t make it a wish, I’d still cherish it, no matter what.”
“No, that won’t do. I have to wish for it. Even if it’s fake… it’s like praying at a temple, isn’t it? For peace of mind and a little bit of luck. As long as it works even a little, that makes it meaningful, doesn’t it?”
The obedient little catgirl hugged my arm tight, making a rare spoiled whimper. The icy, aloof attitude from before melted instantly into a pool of tenderness, wrapping up my helpless self.
The soft sensation spread up from my arm, making me think of the time I volunteered at the animal shelter, when friendly stray cats would curl up next to me for naps—that feeling that made your heart go all soft.
Pressed close to me, Zhi Nian’s heartbeat sped up, though I couldn’t say exactly when.
I didn’t dare look at her. I just forced my thoughts to scatter, staring straight ahead into the dark road, replaying my conversation with the fortune-telling old woman earlier that day.
*****
“Young man, you don’t seem all that disappointed.”
A fortune-teller should be good at cold reading people’s minds, right?
Back in that wooden hut, all I could think about was how grateful I was to have a long enough lifespan, that all the life plans I’d made now had to be redrawn.
I had thought maybe the fortune-teller was just a scammer with a few tricks up her sleeve, and that the white-haired uncle from the general store just happened to have that experience by coincidence, and I was only linking things together in my head.
Besides, I couldn’t prove what the old uncle had told me, and it wasn’t impossible that he was just making up stories to amuse a young guy like me.
Since I was already there, I figured I might as well let myself experience it fully. After all, I didn’t have any cash, and there was no signal for the money in my phone, so she couldn’t take anything from me.
The only thing I worried about was whether a few big guys would suddenly appear and surround me, then use some kind of bamboo-leaf incense like in those bamboo forest stories, knock me out, and sell my organs.
Luckily, reality, while often more outrageous than fantasy, still has its limits—at least for me.
The white-haired uncle and the cloaked old woman had no reason to spend years of effort just to murder me and sell my organs. That sort of wild fantasy was clearly unnecessary.
Once I’d digested all the information the old woman gave me and managed to rein in my wild thoughts, I finally responded to her question.
“Before I came, I thought with my health, I probably wouldn’t make it to forty—would suddenly fall ill with some terminal disease, and die alone in some hospital corner. Now, hearing from you that I’ll live to sixty-five, I actually feel very at peace and relieved inside. Thank you for your comfort.”
I didn’t dare guarantee that what she said would one hundred percent come true, so I was careful with my words.
The old woman chuckled softly, not pressing the issue. In a sense, she didn’t need anything from me. At least a street scammer would want a little money or food, but she could have easily avoided me, letting me get lost in the bamboo forest until I left on my own.
But she was willing to answer my questions and even appeared in person, leading me to her cabin to rest, which made me trust her a lot more.
At worst, I could just think of her as an eccentric recluse whose words were nonsense or self-indulgence, but that would still give me some comfort.
Of course… I still had two more questions to test her with. If she could answer them smoothly, that would prove she really did have some ability.
The old woman set the calico cat in her arms down on the floor. It stretched lazily, just like Zhi Nian does when she wakes up, so limber it made my heart tremble, as if my own heart had turned into soft jelly along with it.
The calico cat stepped gracefully over to me, circled me once, sniffed me with its little nose, then stepped onto my pant leg with muddy paws, gave a “meow,” and dashed out the door.
The old woman brewed a new pot of clear tea and brought it to me.
“Sorry, it’s a little mischievous. Please don’t mind.”
“It’s fine, really. I think it’s cute. It has a lot of personality.”
Maybe it’s because I’ve spent so much time with stray cats and dogs, or maybe it’s Zhi Nian’s influence, but I’ve gotten used to this kind of thing, and I don’t really mind a little dirt on my pants.
“Hehe, if you think so, then it’ll be much easier in the future.”
The old woman suddenly said.
I was confused: “What do you mean?”
She lowered her eyes, the long brim of her cloak hiding her gaze, and I could only see her pale, chapped lips as she slowly spoke words that made cold sweat break out all over me.
“On your sixty-fifth birthday, they’ll be the ones to come welcome you home. If you get used to them now, you won’t reject them too much when the time comes, and things will go a lot more smoothly.”