“Doesn’t it feel cold like this?”
“…It’ll warm up soon. Come on~”
Her warm, moist breath brushed against my bare shoulder.
Her slender fingers tilted my chin up, and the sight of her wine-red robe, seemingly ready to burst at any moment, became impossible to ignore.
As I watched her full, red lips draw closer, the fire of desire burned uncontrollably.
“Wait…”
I managed to suppress the urge to kiss her.
“Wait for what? Can’t we talk after we’re done?”
“I still have something important to say. I have to make it clear beforehand…”
A dangerous glint flickered in her slightly narrowed eyes.
Her movement to brush off her outer garment was decisive, as if she had expected this.
“Fine, fine, fine. Whatever it is, say it quickly!”
“It’s about the photo…”
At the mention of the photo, her pupils dilated briefly before quickly dimming.
Her gaze slowly shifted toward my pillow.
She had indeed seen it—the photo of An Zhi and me.
I had been looking for the perfect moment to confess to her, dragging it out until now.
The more I wanted to touch her tempting skin, the harder it became to speak.
I admitted that, at first, I couldn’t resist her temptation because of the unbearable loneliness.
Now that my reason had returned, I found myself unable to act.
Her weight in my heart had quietly shifted, becoming so significant.
I couldn’t ignore her feelings, nor did I want to hurt her further.
So, before things got worse, I had to confess.
And then, just like that, I would try to forget the memories of An Zhi—
“Hurry up and say it!”
She sat upright on the bed with her arms crossed.
“I… have a girlfriend. A girlfriend who hasn’t come back for a long time.”
“Ha—!? Mingshan, what do you mean? You have a girlfriend and you’re still sleeping with me!? You scumbag, aren’t you ashamed of doing this!?”
The iron bed frame let out a creak as she slapped the mattress heavily, her eyes wide with rage.
I didn’t expect her to have such a violent reaction.
‘I’m sorry. I’m truly sorry.’
In the photo, I had my arm around An Zhi’s shoulder.
That should have been enough to show our relationship.
Why hadn’t I thought of that before?
Perhaps she thought An Zhi and I were just close friends.
“I’m sorry. I was wrong about what happened before, so I have to explain clearly, okay?”
“Nonsense! Otherwise, I won’t be with you anymore! Explain clearly, and then I’ll consider it.”
I pulled the photo from under the pillow and held it before her eyes, pointing at the smiling An Zhi.
“She’s my girlfriend, An Zhi. We met in college and started dating near graduation. She’s a streamer. She left a long time ago to focus on her career. Now she’s under a big company, training and streaming at the same time.”
“Oh, she’s actually quite pretty. It’s your loss for daring to date a streamer. With her looks, she must be making a ton of money. Who would still look at you!?”
She was right.
In the normal course of things, that was exactly how it should be.
The gifts she received every day were worth more than my monthly rent.
Why would she still look at me?
Why would she even bother coming back to tell me we were over?
I, who had been clinging to this, was nothing but a clown.
Su Xixia, whose expression had been solemn just a moment ago, now waved her hand and let out a smile, slightly easing the unease in my heart.
“Yeah, she probably doesn’t look at me anymore,” I said softly.
“Of course she doesn’t! Why else hasn’t she come back? You’re practically a vagrant, while she’s living the high life! If you ask me, she stopped liking you long ago and forgot where you even are!”
“Maybe…”
“Besides, you’ve definitely contacted her, haven’t you? Did she reply?”
I shook my head.
“Because the big company is very strict and doesn’t allow streamers to date, so…”
“No matter how strict they are, she doesn’t even have time to reply to a single message? Mingshan, you’re so naive. Haha, you’re killing me. Hahaha—”
She pointed at my face and laughed hysterically.
I didn’t know how to respond.
She was merely voicing the self-mockery I had kept buried in my heart all this time.
Now, it was time to make a decision.
“I think… she and I have already broken up. Yes, I’m sure we’ve broken up.”
“Tch! I thought it was something serious, but it turns out to be that kind of petty drama. There are plenty of couples from back home who were doing great until one went to the city for a better life and they split up. Did you forget? Several of my close friends are like that. This is reality! We all live in reality!”
“I haven’t forgotten.”
Even if I didn’t agree that this was “petty drama,” I couldn’t find any examples to refute her.
I originally thought An Zhi wasn’t that kind of person, but with reality staring me in the face, I could only accept it.
A warm sensation spread from the back of my hand.
Only then did I realize her hot little hand had gripped mine at some point, occasionally increasing her strength as if urging me.
“I thought it was something big! You’d rather care about a woman who’s been gone forever, so why don’t you put some heart into me? I’m the one who’s sincere. I’m the woman who will never leave and will always stay by your side!”
“It’s my fault.”
It was true.
No matter what, the person who had actually been by my side during this time was Su Xixia.
She helped me cook, wash clothes, and clean, taking care of this shitty apartment without leaving for a second.
I owed her.
I owed her a lot.
Once I cleared my head, it felt as though a thousand-pound weight had been lifted from my body, and I relaxed instantly.
“Good! It’s fine as long as you understand.”
The corners of her mouth curled up.
She shook the robe off her shoulders, revealing the wine-red lingerie underneath, tight against her fair skin and digging slightly into her flesh.
If I just lightly pressed the clasp hidden deep between her cleavage…
“Yeah.”
I swallowed hard.
“Have you been holding back for a long time? Come on. I’ve been looking forward to it, too, wondering when you’d finally hold me. I feel like I want to be filled; it’s so lonely. You too? Hmm?”
She grabbed my hand, and I felt the itchy sensation of her nails scratching my palm.
If I just reached out and unfastened that button…
It felt as though I could throw everything from the past behind me and start anew.
I raised my arm and, with trembling fingers, pressed that reset button—
*Snap—*
As the clasp popped open and her beauty was revealed, something deep in my heart seemed to break along with it.
“Wow! That wasn’t easy, was it? Hehe~”
In the hot breath near my ear, I heard her uncontrollable light laughter.
I gradually sank into it, as if crawling into a warm, soft waterbed, craving more.
***
When I got home from work that day, Su Xixia came running over.
Uncharacteristically, her face was red with anxiety, and she grabbed my arm tightly, pulling me toward her.
“Mingshan! Mingshan!”
What could make this headstrong woman so anxious?
Could it be…?
“Mingshan, Mingshan! What is that ‘courier station’ thing? Where is it!?”
As soon as she spoke, the tension building inside me vanished instantly.
It was both frustrating and hilarious.
“Did you shop online? It was delivered to the courier station, right?”
“Yeah! I thought it would be delivered straight to the door. It says it’s at the station. Isn’t that someone else’s house!?”
“That’s a pickup point. You just have to go get it.”
It was ridiculous.
We used to get deliveries back in the old hometown too; had she really never dealt with this?
Despite her abrasive personality, she was so behind when it came to adapting to the modern era.
I even had to teach her how to use the washing machine; before that, she had been washing everything by hand.
She hesitated for a long while, her face growing hot, before she questioned me.
“You’re making me go alone?”
“Fine, I’ll take you. You didn’t buy anything weird, did you?”
At my question, her cheeks turned even redder, and she pinched my arm hard.
“Ask, ask, ask! You’ll know when we get back!”
And so, I walked out of the apartment being half-dragged by her.
Once outdoors, she became like a gentle lamb, clinging to my side without saying a word.
What was the deal with her?
Was she only tough at home?